Rihanna and Chris Brown Back Together

The pair have reunited almost three weeks after Brown, 19, allegedly battered the “Umbrella” singer on Feb. 8, a source tells PEOPLE. “They’re together again. They care for each other,” says the source. The on-again couple are currently spending time together at one of Sean “Diddy” Combs’s homes. Adds the source: “While Chris is reflective and saddened about what happened, he is really happy to be with the woman he loves.” In its latest issue, PEOPLE reports that Brown called Rihanna on her 21st birthday one week ago. “He called to wish her happy birthday,” a source told the magazine. “They’ve reached out to each other. It’s been mutual.”

Well I guess that she’s just used up her lifetime supply of good will, & she’s only 20. She’s undermined the credibility of women who are actually struggling to get out of abusive relationships. Is this a reconciliation, or a rematch?

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Looking over our shoulders & living in the past

Rather than dwelling on the sleazy antics of today’s pro celebs, let’s take a look back at the golden age of American Entertainment. In the following clip, This Is Your Life features one of America’s most beloved comedians  –Lou Costello.
Now let’s look back, but slightly more recent, at a ‘lost interview’ with Bruce Lee by Canadian journalist Pierre Burton.
Now for a follow up on Bruce Lee’s ideas with a short video on zen.
Jordan Maxwellism – “The Egyptian god Horus represents the sun. The sun travels across the sky in 12 steps or hours! Hours spells Horus! When the sun goes down we say it has set. Set – the Egyptian god of darkness. This stuff is in plain sight people – research it so you won’t be ignorant sheep. Baaa, baaa.” Oh yeah, and the 12 Step movement is part of the conspiracy too! It’s a conspiracy tool! They want to discourage drinking because it interferes with the Illuminati mind control!
McLuhanism: “Data as the content of electronic communications technology, becomes the pollution of the Information Age. Artists love garbage, it’s a creative medium. Whether or not trash is treasure depends on an understanding of the effect.
Canada + America = Camerica?
Coming soon to MocksureCamerica”  the secret Illuminati manifest destiny plot to create North American Union! Here’s a hint, John Stewart is paving the way! If you don’t believe it then here are a few lines of the Camerican national anthem – to be sung to the tune of America the Beautiful – discovered by a Mocksure operative!
Camerica, Camerica, a new land strong and free,
Camerica, Camerica, we stand on guard for thee!
Now you didn’t think that Pres Obama’s rushed 7 hour quickie strip to Canada was just to pick up Tim Horton maple logs for the kids did you?? Why Russia even scrambled a bomber that was intercepted over the Canadian Arctic while the pres was in town! Although I hear that Americans do go wild over maple logs things.
PS: Mexico is to be joined with the by then independent Republic of Texas to form the new state of Texaco! A Pan America union of the 3 countries had been planned, but ran into trouble when it was learned that the name Panama had already been taken, & Van Halen was threatening to sue over the rights!!
new VH
Classic VH
PPS: Jesus is just alright with me
If Umberto Eco’s Foucault’s Pendulum, & the rise of talk radio have shown us that people love a good conspiracy theory, especially if it’s untrue! The conspiracy theory is a key component of many religions. In fact cult’s, like Scientology, have reduced their whole theology to a conspiracy theory. Since they’re the new kids on the block and have to make up for the big head start enjoyed by traditional sects, and strip down their belief system by eliminating all that stuff about compassion, and concentrate only on what really works, like raging paranoia! Like people, they settle down once they’ve made some money and gotten established. They then feel free to move on to less threatening ideas; like social justice – as long as no body gets hurt, and same sex marriage – as long as everyone agrees with it.
Even if they’re really out to get you, your problems might only be in your head
Paranoia will destroy ya, so remember that just because they’re out to get you doesn’t mean you’re not paranoid; and if they’re out to get you then cracking up, like Richard Nixon, won’t help!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

‘Week Link’ – What’s Cooking At The National Enquirer??

A little something that they’re working on for next week – I got some sources on the inside ;). They’re really running the gamut, with Mariah C as the only weak link – couldn’t they have done a Katie Holmes Collapses/on the breaking point/on the verge of walking out story? 
For a ‘truly shocking’ recent picture of Lisa Rinna and her lips, check out Collagen Lip Overload! The rest of Lisa’s face is getting harder to see.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Bare Naked Breakup

Everything You've Done Wrong @ Yahoo! Video

By now Barenaked Ladies fans must still be reeling from the news – Steven Page is quiting the band. This seems to be the culmination of a misadventure that started to get public a little while ago, down in Syracuse New York. Steven, who was no longer with his wife, had gone to visit his American girlfriend. The story’s pretty well known by now: they had a scene at a night club, Page drove back drunk to their room, girlfriend follows and then leaves in a huff, Page a girlfriend’s room mate start doing lines, cops are called do to car parked in middle of road (left by girlfriend), cops ask if the can come in, Steve lets them in (major mistake in this series of errors), cops ask “is that coke I see you doing?”, Steve answers “I’m not gonna lie to you officers” (another big mistake!), and then Steve & Co are escorted to the Police Dept for mug shots.
Of course fans were shocked that Steve had left his wife, was apparently seeing a crazy slut (if her mugshot is any indication), and doing drugs. Completely inconsistent with his image as a bright, grounded guy. While people were debating whether or not the business had finally gotten to him (it will I’m told), his BNL comrade Ed Robertson crashed his private plane. The press was more interested in stories about drugs and sluts – so Robertson’s crash became a footnote.
Now Steve, who is a very bright guy and was a grounded fellow for years, went on to explain to everyone that he didn’t know what got into him – besides the coke he’d snorted that is – and that he was very sorry. The judge said that was okay, and his sentence would be suspended if he could keep his nose clean for the next 6 months. The same went for the others involved in the case: Page’s girlfriend and her room mate.
Page successfully managed to keep out of trouble, but by then the tension had set in with the band. Only a few days ago BNL co founder Ed Robertson announced for Page that Page would be leaving the act. The BNL wasn’t break up mind you – the show was just going on with out one of it’s most recognizable members. While page said nothing, Ed made statements in the Canadian media. At first he insisted that the break up was amicable and mutual (just like Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston!). Cynics remarked that show business bust ups are seldom amicable, especially when the participants say they are. Sure enough, in an interview on CBC Radio’s As It Happens only last night, indications of some pent up tension started to emerge.
In the beginning of the interview Ed Robertson still maintained that this was an mutual decision, and that Steve had other stuff to do. How ever it didn’t take much pressuring from the program host for other things to start coming out. Ed quickly went from “We all just felt that this was the best way to move forward” to “Well I had a plane crash that no on wanted to talk about. Everything was ‘What about Steve’s drug bust?‘” When asked if he remembered what Steve said when the spilt was decided on, Robertson responded “Yeah. I remember what he said, but I’m not gonna repeat it. Maybe some day“. When the host mentioned that many fans were posting on message boards that they were pissed at not getting a chance to ‘say good bye’ to Page as a band member, Robertson basically brushed the question aside. So it’s safe to infer that some tension  had built up, particularly between the band’s two co founding members.
As for the future, the Barenaked Ladies are assuring there fans that the show will go on, even without Page. So far there are no talks about a replacement member – so it’s uncertain whether they will continue as a 5 man act, or in quartet form. There also doesn’t seem to have been any official statement from Page. It’s got to be tough to see a twenty year plus chapter of your life close. Page and Robertson had known each other since grade 4. They started the band on a lark, as an act for Toronto’s Annual Harvest Food bank drive. Robertson chose the name based on an ‘in joke’ between himself and Page. They made their breakthrough on Speaker’s Corner – the one dollar ‘video booth’ that allowed anyone to record a message which might later be played on CHUM TV stations. All 5 members of BNL squeezed into the same booth and sang “Be My Yoko Ono“. Improvisation and comedic stage presence would go on to be hall marks of their performances, and what endeared them to their fans. The comedic touches also seemed to show that they were still just a bunch of high school pals just having laughs. They didn’t take themselves or the business too seriously. Now that seems to have changed, and 20 years of personal history have gone by the way. We can only hope that the Ladies manage to over come their differences at some point; if not for the sake of a second act, at least for the sake of some pretty rich personal history.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Richard Syrett Firing – international reaction

Richard Syrett’s firing is making waves in the international conspiracy community. It got covered on the Alex Jones show. The caller mentions it at approx 4 mins into the clip.
Notice Jones visibly wince when the caller informs him about Syrett’s dismissal. Alex Jones had been a Richard Syrett guest on numerous occasions. Syrett got canned without warning and despite high ratings. He was beating Coast to Coast AM in many markets, and did a vastly superior show. his last program was on Jan 20, when he covered the Barack Obama citizenship story. Current buzz among the conspiracy crowd is that the citizenship story may have had something to do with his sudden firing by Astral Media! Keeping checking Richard Syrett’s website for updates!
Speaking of behind the scenes going on, here’s a ‘behind the scenes’ look at some of the actors from classic 1970’s sci fi series UFO out of their on screen characters, as the attend some of the numerous fan conventions.
UFO only lasted about 30 episodes, approx half as many as Star Trek, yet is developed a devoted fan following. Interest in the show began to spike again in the late 80’s when the theme started to become popular in dance club remixes. When the series finally got released on DVD, it became a sensation in Japan and Italy. It still enjoys growing popularity in sci fi circles. incidentally UFO co stars Ed Bishop and Michael BillingtonCommander Straker and Col Foster respectively – died less than a week apart in June 2005.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Angelina Losing Face Over Double Trouble? Jolie finally pwned!

Celebrity Face Off

Angelina Jolie received and unexpected proposal recently, and it wasn’t marriage to Brad Pitt. According to Mike Walker by way of the National Enquirer, a producer friend of Jolie’s think s that she would be just perfect for the role of Octomom. His reasoning: they’re the same age, they’re both complicated and controversial characters, and they’re both uber mothers.
Jolie has finally spawned a monster & Brad Has Picked Up on the Similarities
Apparently the fellow was even reckless enough to pitch the idea to AJ – going on to point out that the publicity would be beyond huge. I guess he assumed that since AJ likes publicity, and can’t get enough, then that would be the angle to sell it. Apparently Jolie was not enthused about the idea of portraying her own impostor on screen. In fact the only thing that saved the poor fellow was when Brad Pitt walked in and said “You really ought to consider it. You’re both supermoms.” Then with a wink he suggested that it was all a joke. So the unknown producer was off the hook. I usually tell people my bad ideas were only jokes, when they’re not well received too. Well supermom has finally given birth to that monster we were all expecting!
It’s a bad case of spitting image – so take it to the next level!
Still it might not be a bad idea. Nadya Suleman has been making a mockery of Jolie’s over heated image by portraying her in the reality TV of network pseudo news. Portraying her own imitator on the big screen might be a chance for Jolie to reverse the spin by reversing the roles, and playing off of the very woman who has co opted her image. It would be a put on of the put on so to speak. When image is you business, this sort of unintentional parody can be disaster. Like it or not Jolie is a big part of a story that is now bigger than she is! Jolie either has to get control of it or go away quietly! She might have to work with it instead of against it – if you can’t beat ’em join ’em!
Only kidding, but the joke’s on you
As for the producer, I have to question whether or not he was really joking. Suleman’s been shopping around for million dollar homes lately – so some one has been making the made for TV version of Jolie offers. As for Mr Pitt, I’m sure that he does see the humour in the situation, although his comments do come off as sounding passive aggressive. He did put his finger neatly on one thing – this is a farce and the jokes on Angelina!
Seaking of comic exageration – Lisa Rinna
Bloated mouth and fake orange tan – she’s pretty far gone! Remember the Mocksure posting on Celebrity Alien Psychobombs? Impersonating her would be a more of a job for a drag queen! Photo courtesy of BulletProofBracelets! I hear that PETA is investigating her based an a tip off that she’s using baby seal blubber as lip filler!
Octomom – Marshall McLuhan would have a field day!
PS. It’s really fascinating – Octomom has managed to steal Jolie’s thunder by capturing key components of her image and forming them into a distorted version that is almost more Jolie than Jolie is herself: craziness, big lips, too many kids, and quarrels with parents (Jolie has created an image based on exaggeration – part of what makes the imitation/parody so powerful. Exaggeration is one of Jolie’s most characteristic features!). It’s much the same as a satirical cartoon caricaturing a politician. Like a caricature cartoon it’s beginning to have a subversive effect on Jolie’s public image. Pitt’s comments only add fuel to the fire – he’s supposedly the one who knows her best. The story started by playing off of Jolie’s image, but now Jolie is starting to become a sideline – like the ventriloquists dummy that takes over the act! Her only response at this time might be turning the tables. As for Nadya Suleman, if she knows what she’s doing then she’s a bloody genius! The story is image, let’s see how it develops.
Speaking of the insideous effect of image, here’s Jordan Maxwell to who you where all those occult phallic images are hinding in plain sight!
Speaking of secret societies with hidden agendas, what about the Million Dollar Round Table? It sounds kind’a ominous! If it’s anything like Bohemian Grove, then it’s just a place where successful middle aged men can enjoy male on male nudity in a supportive environment.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Kiefer Sutherland’s Drunken Pub Punch Up!

It was previously mentioned on Mocksure that Kiefer Sutherland was back on the sauce. It was the post that included a picture of a toasted Kiefer sitting at a bar table with his pants and under wear down ’round his ankles. Well here’s the rest of the story!
The details, by way of the National Enquirer, are that Kiefer was drinking it up at Manhattan night spot called Peter Dillon’s. He was enjoying round after round of Maker’s Mark Whiskey cocktails. At first he was easy going and a gentleman. As the night wore on and Kiefer got more lit up, he pulled his Jekyll & Hyde routine. Some one at a near by table made a remark, and that was it. Kiefer was on his feet, unsteadily, and swinging punches in the fellow’s general direction.
Fortunately Kiefer was far too uncoordinated by that time to do any serious damage. His buddies easily managed to restrain him, and hustled him towards the door.  Meanwhile Kiefer was apologizing, and throwing $20’s around. Now that was a wild night! He’d better watch it or he’ll be looking at more jail time, and that will mean another celebrity mugshot! It might mean the end of 24, too!
BTW a very special birthday greeting to veteran actor Abe Vigoda – who starred in The Godfather and Barney Miller among others. As you’ll see, he’s a real gent. Just watch!
Now Rosario Dawson on Wonder Woman!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Brangie Over?

In Touch Mag is reporting by way of their cover that Brangelina is over. They’ve highlighted this with the title “Get Out” in big bold letters.  Well let me for one say “I Blame Brangelina”. I blame them for everything, but  most of all I blame the tiresome twosome for sexing up American! These are hard times and we don’t need that kind of excitement! We need big fat guys to make us laugh – like Jack Black! Both Brad and Angie were better off with other partners who mitigated their over bearing hotness – the way Billy Bob Thornton did for AJ, and Jennifer Aniston did for Brad (The standard sun and satellite arrangement, rather than a blinding binary star!). They were just so much easier to take separately. Brangelina is one stimulus package that we can do with out!

My Theory: Jolie comes across as one of those people everyone thinks is fantastic, as long as they don’t have to live with them. Her (apparently) level of intensity would wear thin fast if you had to put up with it on a daily basis. They probably planned to keep It together for the Oscars, and see what happened. They were both nominated so a double win might’ve added a few years on to the act, but any other outcome meant ‘dunzo’. Plus they were overdone, and beginning to become old news. Now neither of them can really take that.
The tip offs: Angie complaining of boredom and Brad hitting the bottle. Men drink when a relationship has become unbearable. Remove the alcohol and they’re down to the last three options – leave, go nuts, or kill someone.
Now here are a few more danger signals, for entertainment purposes only!
Jordon Maxwell is the first name in pseudo scholarship! He’s the guy that David Icke steals ideas from!!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

The Future is in Conspiracy Theories!


A strange alignment of planets. Maybe these guys would know.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Head Trips

Fame is like being the stiff at your own funeral!

Overdosing yourself is not the sort of behavior that should be rewarded. I say that as a Heath Ledger fan – giving him an Oscar for overdosing disgraces his memory more than anything else. I’m not sure he would’ve wanted it that way. He seemed like a basically decent and good natured guy: so I don’t think he would want his career cheapened with the idea that he won for something other than his performance, nor would he want the message sent to other young actors that death can be a shrewd career move. Ledger’s performance as The Joker outclassed Jack Nicholson’s. Had he lived and kept performing at that level then he would’ve been the guy in Hollywood. Had he kept improving as he did from Brokeback Mountian to Dark Knight, then in ten years we would’ve been saying “Brando Who?” As it is in 10 years people are gonna look back at Ledger and say “Oh yeah, he’s the guy who OD’d and then won an Oscar“. 

The implication being that ODing was a major factor in his winning the award. Maybe it’s some sign of Hollywood’s collective sense of guilt (remember River Phoenix? Johnny Depp got to wear the blame – scape goat style – on that one for a while, so Hollywood wouldn’t have to face responsibility for the milieu they created. Depp may have owned the Viper Room, but who packed it full every night and made it a fashionable place to be?? The Viper Room didn’t exist in a vacuum but as a response to a milieu that doesn’t look over your shoulder while you’re having fun. Drugs is a big part of the fun). Then again clumsy gestures, like crude humour and simplistic politics, are among of Hollywood’s specialties!

Is Hollywood power structure more of a nervous system?
Oscar Night was a great night for the family of Heath Ledger. His mother and father flew in from Australia to honour his memory and claim his award on behalf of his daughter Matilda. They’re so busy claiming stuff on her behalf that it’ll be wonder if they leaving anything for her to claim, when she comes of age (the Heath clan has a reputation for being acquisitive – one of his uncles even got arrested for stealing farm equipment down in Australia, only months after Ledger’s death). Had her father lived then that wouldn’t be a problem.
Ledger goes down in history – the guy who won because he OD’d
Heath Ledger became a Hollywood causality. People who live that lifestyle seem to share a reduced life expectancy, along with air traffic controllers and pro wrestlers. Some might argue that abnormal personality types are attracted to the profession, and that they were more likely to off themselves in any case. All stars egos aside, there are other pressures that contribute to the fatal Hollywood head trip: there’s the constant flattery of hangers on, the pressure and mind games of agents and managers, the unrealistic expectations of the studios, and of course the mutual mind fucking of the rich, famous and idle. Then of course there is drugs.
His moment of triumph? “Well Heath I’m sorry you couldn’t make it tonight”
Heath Ledger died of drugs, and he was the latest in a very long list. Drugs are a part of the Hollywood scene the way cocktails and cigarettes were for 1950’s middle class suburbia. They are a way for aspiring actors to explore their ‘consciousness’ and there by potentially improve their performances. They are away to escape the constant pressures associated with the high powered big money lifestyle (wrong hard play hard). They’re a way to loosen up and escape inhibitions so that the Hollywood player can more fully participate in the fast lane lifestyle. They’re away to fit into tho the drug saturated LA milieu. They are also an excellent way to go off your head. 
It helps if you’re crazy, and there are ways to help the crazy along!
Observers can’t help noticing the sometimes bizarre behaviour of the glitterati. While some of that is attributable to the personality quirks of person who crave fame, a lot of it might be caused by deliberately induced chemical imbalances. Just take a look at the following documentary for more info.
You’ve gotta go out of your mind to use your head“. That’s like saying you’ve got to blow your brains out to open your mind. The only sane answer to that would be “You first” and hand them back the loaded revolver. After listening to some of that drugged out prattle it should be obvious where the New Age started – surprise, surprise!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists