Tiger Crashes

Tiger Woods was involved in an early morning crash. Lest you think that success has gone to his head and he was tanked up behind the wheel; here’s the unofficial story. As you know Tiger married a Swede who was working as a nanny for another golfer. Rumour was that this girl was on the make and looking for some one rich but a little naive. Naturally she moved in on Tiger. Gold brickers don’t make the best life partners, and it began to show in Tiger’s game, though people blamed that on the death of his mentor and father.

video courtesy of www.wesh.com

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Well now the rest of the story is starting to emerge. The reason Tiger was out in his SUV at 2 AM is because he is allegedly seeing a cocktail waitress, Rachel Uchitel. I suppose that he’s trying to find the comfort and solace he isn’t getting from his greedy shrewish wife. Now juggling 2 tramps on the make can be tricky business, even for some one as talented as Woods (It’s really more of a job for a John F Kennedy).

The pressure finally got to him and he flipped his car. That lead a trip to the hospital, and a lot PR media noise, and the eventual announcement that Tiger is basically OK – physically that is. He still has those tricky relationship problems to deal; with. Like they used to say in the old days – “no sex when you’re playing the game!” On the bright side at least we won’t have to hear about that buck toothed squinty eyed Taylor Swift for a awhile. Maybe even for several hours!

tiger woods crashes SUV

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Jesse Ventura – Political Victim?

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White House Crashers Angling For Reality TV Deal

So this was all another reality TV scheme! Perhaps if they’d used a tinfoil balloon to float over the White House security perimeter, while dangling a small child, they’d have had more impact. They’d certainly have been facing some stiff charges and psych assessments. The psych assessments might be a good idea anyway and highly recommended for any one seriously considering a career in entertainment.

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Kate Winslet gets Bambi Award

I bet you didn’t even know that there was a BAMBI award! That dumb bitch Winslet probably didn’t either, but that didn’t stop her from showing up to accept. Now that brings me to my plan to revitalize the economy – we just hold way more award shows. The promise of adulation, and shiny little statuettes, is bound to be a powerful lure to celebrities, and their money!

wonder woman award

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Ninja Assassin Movie Review

Is it my imagination or does the reviewer look like a young Hilary Clinton? Why that’s probably the same revolted expression Hilary had when Bill proposed whatever little Faustian deal they refer to as a marriage.

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Weekly Comic Book Review 11/25/09 Part 2

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Don Cherry – Violent Thug

http://d.yimg.com/m/up/ypp/sports/player.swf

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