Tom Cruise is in the news

Wondertrash – chewing the fat through thick & thin

It depends what you mean by gay…

The National Enquirer has a provocative cover this week. While the issue contains no definitive proof that Tom Cruise is now or ever has been gay, it does take aim at Sci, based on a new book by defector Amy Scobee. First Scobee tackles the gay rumors, claiming that they were made up by imprisoned Hollywood PI Anthony Pellicano. According to Scobee, Pellicano was in the habit of making up rumors about his celeb clientele and then running to them with offers to fix the problem.

… and by lies!

The new book says that the gay rumors really broke Tom up. He even had to have a heart to heart with Katie Holmes about them. Tom confided his secret anguish to the lady in his life. He told Ms. Cruise that the gay talk was “a pack of lies”. Katie was shocked and had never heard the stories. I had no idea Dawson’s Creek was so far off the beaten path! It must be up in Alaska or something.

High on life, and on auditing

Worse still were the drug rumors. Tom feels that his image was tainted by the stories (though nowadays his image is tainted by much worse). Now the drug rumors are supported in the book. Scobee claims that auditors regularly spill their guts about what goes on in sessions, especially if anything interesting gets dredged up. This goes on to be in church gossip of the Mrs. Rev. Lovejoy variety. According to Scobee she got it from a very high source (David Miscavige’s wife Shelly) that Tom was turned down for Seeorg due to past drug use. Ms Miscavidge goes on to say that pot or coke wouldn’t be enough to disqualify you.

The walls have ears and the spies have eyes

Shelly had even more to say to Scobee. Ms Miscavige at one point confessed that there was a gay sex tape on the loose featuring one of the Church’s most prominent spokespersons. Now that’s not necessarily Tom. John Travolta does a lot of work for Sci, and has been known to enjoy a kiss on the mouth from attractive men, who are often in his employ! Anyway Shelly gets herself all upset and finally exclaims “we had to do something about that man!” Scientology regards homosexuality as a disease, like alcoholism or Tourette’s Syndrome.

may the force be with you

The plot thickens. Scobee goes on to reveal that everyone in Tom Cruise’s household, from the lord chamberlain down to the court jester, is also working for Miscavige as spies. Naturally the staff reports back to Darth Vader, who is their real boss of bosses. As a result Davey Boy knows everything about everything about the Cruise’s.

To boldly go

No question that Tom is a star in the Scientology galaxy. His former auditor Mark Rathbun, has become officially the second highest person in the organization (de jure that is, Tom is de facto). Mark was even assigned the touchy Nicole Kidman situation. Apparently Miscavige was no fan of Nicole and made Rathbun point man on the divorce, to get it done. Well no organized religion is all bad. Rathbun has confirmed this in his own words (as written for him by David Miscavige – we know that no one in Scientology would break wind without his permission): “in 2001 through 2003 Miscavige personally assigned me as Inspector General RTC – the second highest ecclesiastical position in the religion – to coordinate Tom’s divorce from Nicole and to serve as his auditor.”

very interesting

So it seems like Ms. Scobee’s book is gonna be even more interesting than Kitty Kelley’s Oprah bio. Now the book is called Scientology: Abuse at the Top. You might want to keep a look out for it at your local bookstore. Meanwhile here are some more interesting related links:

Anthony Pellicano

Tom Cruise’s lawyer has responded


Charlie does Klinger

Meanwhile it looks like Charlie Sheen has managed to get clear of his drug addicted wife Brooke Mueller, and without the help of David Miscavige! The pair were back and forth following their Christmas Day altercation. An impasse had developed where Charlie wanted Brooke to drop the charges and go away, while Brooke wanted to stay around and help Charlie collect his $20 mill.

Joke’s on Brooke

Sometimes the best way out of a stalemate is not an ultimatum but a good old fashioned game of chicken. Charlie started saying that he was gonna quit 2 1/2 Men cause he no longer gave a damn. Bye bye $20 mill! Then he shaved his head and started walking around in pajama bottoms to show he was crazy enough to mean it. He even posed for paparazzi while holding up his InTouch issue entitled Dumbest Disguise Ever. He was grinning ear to ear.

Do short cuts get you anywhere in the long run?

Brooke probably couldn’t take the embarrassment any more. A genuine sense of humor is always worrying to earnest game players. So much so that it’s often mistaken for insanity. Soulless Morlocks just don’t get humor – their minds are too tactical. Fortunately this got clued up before Chuck started wearing dresses and bed wetting and then talking to TMZ about it.

Reverse spin = no spin? Is spin in the eyes of the beholder?

Now a South Park update. As you’ll recall the producers got themselves into some hot water with another swipe at organized religion. Now FOX News (Is “FOX News” becoming oxymoronic? That’s a step up from moronic I guess) has come to their defense, sort of. FOX has not so much come to their defense, or even the defense of free speech in general, as they have taken the opportunity to make a point about their favorite pet peeve – liberals. It is FOX, so you know what to expect.


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