Hollywood Legend Tony Curtis Dies at 85

This Explains Everything

There’s more to life than the contents of Paris Hilton’s handbag, or Britney Spears drawers. AS it turns out there’s way more. So much more that you can’t imagine, but we can scratch the surface of the tips of the ice berg – in the following short and entertaining video. First thing to bear in mind: there’s not only a cover up going on but a whole damned conspiracy. “How big is it? You might as well ask “How big is big” Let’s just say that it’s cosmic!

UFO: The Majestic 12 Documents, Full Documentary

While everyone has heard about Majestic 12, there are a few things that are not generally known about it. For instance Vannevar Bush – grand dad to George W, was a a founding member (Dr Edward “H Bomb” Teller was also a founding member). M12 was original set up to investigate and suppress UFO reports. However, and according to some conspiracy theories, they eventually went on to make full contact with extra terrestrial entities, and then govern Earth on their behalf. However,as all true conspiracy theorists known – the only real conspiracy is the one that nobody else knows about!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Gordon Ramsey – Hot Potato

“Joe was a brilliant chef, and our thoughts go out to his family, friends and staff”


Now everyone who’s watched high intensity TV chef Gordon Ramsey knows he brings the heat into the kitchen. Some people are now saying that the loud mouthed celebrity chef is too hot too handle. The somebody is his fellow Hot Potato TV judge Eric Ripert. Ripert lashed out at Ramsey via social networking site Twitter following the death by suicide of their colleague Joseph Cerniglia.

“Your business is about to f–king swim down the Hudson”

Cerniglia has his problems. His restaurant was 80 000 in debt. To make matters even worse he’d recently gotten busted for cocaine. The bust took place in his restaurant. Now that leads to a whole other bag of trouble. In addition to jail time, he could’ve wound up losing the business, depending on whether or not prosecutors felt like making a federal case out of it. So Cerniglia decided to beat them to the punch by jumping the gun. He jumped off of a bridge into the Hudson River.

Though Cerniglia had plenty of personal problems not everyone is willing to let Ramsay off of the hook. Ramsay’s co judge on his latest reality TV chef show, Eric Ripert, took to Twitter to give Gordo a blast. Said Ripert via the social networking site:

“Nothing personal against Gordon Ramsay but he is a poor inspiration for
professional chefs in his shows,” Ripert tweeted. “I have my bad days to but
always try to improve. TV or not – its no excuse! Ultimately I believe in the
goodness of Gordon but he is very wrong.”

Ramsay can be hard to take. On one episode he made reference to Cerniglia’s personal troubles by telling him that his business was about to swim down the Hudson. Nor is this the 1st Ramsay chef to cash in their chips. In 2007 a Hell’s Kitchen chef, Rachel Brown, shot herself in her Dallas home. There’s another Ramsay connection – the chef’s brother is a long term heroin addict. For the uninitiated, heroin is a major pain receiver. So some are speculating that Ramsay is a hard man to deal with. At the very least he’s probably not the guy to call if you’re standing on the George Washington Bridge thinking about jumping and looking for some one to hand you a life line.

Success stories & shit news

This kind of casual, cool realism has given the new British films easy ascendancy. Room at the
Top features the new cool realism. Not only is it not a success story, it is as much an
announcement of the end of the Cinderella package as Marilyn Monroe was the end of the star
system. Room at the Top is the story of how the higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of his
backside. The moral is that success is not only wicked but also the formula for misery. It is very
hard for a hot medium like film to accept the cool message of TV. But the Peter Sellers movies I’m
All Right, Jack and Only Two Can Play are perfectly in tune with the new temper created by the
cool TV image. Such is also the meaning of the ambiguous success of Lolita. As a novel, its
acceptance announced the antiheroic approach to romance. The film industry had long beaten out
a royal road to romance in keeping with the crescendo of the success story. Lolita announced that
the royal road was only a cowtrack, after all, and as for success, it shouldn’t happen to a dog.

~Marshall McLuhan, Understanding Media


Ring out those solstice bells – Hollywood style!

Happy Equinox Mother Earth! – PETA now officially as irrelevant as The Celebrity Roast!

There has been another occurrence of PETA. The controversial organization, which seems more interested in PR stunts and fund raising than offering genuine assistance to animals or the environment, showed that it was still relevant despite Lady Gaga’s meaty pro gay statements. BTW Lady Gaga also recently wore a meat dress, though some of the more timid members of Gaga’s entourage are now insisting that the dress was tofu – of the mock chicken variety. Gaga has stuck to her guns on this, insisting that she hasn’t tasted like chicken, mock or otherwise, in years.

it’s a jungle out here!

Anyway the usual array of Hollywood activists and agitators were out en masse and in force to rally round the cause by showing their commitment to making the world a better place. Pamela Anderson was there, of course. Anderson looks in dire need of artificial preservatives, or something to off set he effects of 20 years of drinking, drugging, partying, taking rides from strangers, and general Jerri Blanking around. She also spouted a bunch of platitudes which were a mish mash of other platitudes she has aired in public from time to time “Cruelty is bad, unless it’s show business related“, “Eating animals is bad, stick to eating people cause people are animals too“, and “Kid Rock had a really small dick!” While she may not have been sincere, or even coherent, she did sound as enthusiastic as a cheerleader midway through a pep rally – which is as much as you can expect from any pro celeb. Why do I get the impression that if some scientist found out how to turn baby seal blubber into facial filler no seal pup would be safe from her?

cruel to be kind? Take that, Dexter!

Dave Navarro was there and gave his 2 cents worth. “People who wear fur should be skinned and eaten!” That’s the trouble with the Hollywood folk, they’ll grab at any excuse for cannibalism, and shitty shitty scat play! Giving Dave the benefit of the doubt, perhaps he assumes that cannibalism would be some kind of fur deterrent, like the death penalty is for murder, which he’s no doubt against, the death penalty I mean. He already sounds pretty pro murder, as long as it’s in a worthwhile, ecologically conscious, and politically correct cause. Just like Alec Balwin when he appeared on Latenight and asked the American Public to rise up and slaughter the pro impeachment factions of the House & Senate back in the Bull Clinton era. Then again maybe Dave just got confused about the concept of a dude ranch! Navarro’s strictly a free range celebrity!

more or less

Speaking of sound and fury Baldwin was there to voice his support for the cause. Baldwin doesn’t look like he missed too many meals, and I’m sure he hasn’t been bulking up on tofu. Incidentally Alec was the one recorded calling his daughter Ireland an ignorant little pig during a now infamous telephone message. So basically his PETA support puts that in perspective. He wasn’t insulting his daughter, but expressing his love buy comparing her to one of Mother Nature’s blessed little creatures. In fact during that call it sounded like he loved her so much that she was becoming an endangered species. Anyway Alec got off the hook for that when it became clear that his wife Kim Bassigner, leaked the tape to get at him – there by proving that she loved her daughter even more, or less, than he does!

celebs have a beef with fur


where’s the beef?

I love how most of these characters look too doped up and jaded to even muster the wide eyed sincerity of some one to whom the idea had just occurred. “Well animals you know, that’s bad. We’ve gotta do something about that, the situation I mean, not the animals. It’s gotta be stopped.” In other words this was an opportunity to be seen and heard while gaining cred in connection with a worthwhile cause. “Celebrities like to look like they care about stuff,” as Sting said on an episode of the Simpsons (on an interesting aside and Internet acquaintance of mine told me about how Sting had lectured at their high school on the rain forest. Sting seemed sincere to the point that my friend was genuinely moved. About a week later friend goes to a Police concert. Friend gets back stage, meets Sting again and asks “Hows the rain forest doing?” Sting replies “How the fuck should I know?“). They delivered the message with the thoughtfulness and clarity of a Sarah Palin, too (no wonder Palin is the first ‘celebrity politician’ and hated by celebrities harboring political ambitions. We hate most in others what in them is most like ourselves. So a politician harboring celebrity aspirations is just too much to take!). Fortunately no mischievous types were there, to ask them whether or not they were concerned that their pro PETA stance might be interpreted as anti gay in light of Lady Gaga’s recent commentary. Then again there wasn’t much chance of that, since no one really relevant goes to PETA anymore, not even PINK!

“Save the Image” & Hollywood Humane Society, otherwise known as the retirement fund for aging pop cultural icons

Now I’m not criticizing celebs for being phony, superficial, narcissistic, and insincere in there political support – no wait that’s exactly what I’m doing. That kind of involvement cheapens even a worthwhile cause, to say nothing of bull shit organizations like PETA (PETA reputedly euthanizes a greater percentage of animals turned over to it’s care than the curiously named Humane Society. It’s something like 98%. In fact PETA workers have stood trial incidents involving the disposal of bags of euthanized dogs & cats in garbage dumpsters. PETA’s response was something to the effect of “We’re not about saving individual dogs and cats but about raising awareness of the issue“. Then they went on to announce the release of George Clooney flavoured tofu. They didn’t actually release the tofu. It seemed more like an excuse for a news conference. Perhaps there just wasn’t enough demand for Clooney flavoured food.). So it raises the question “Couldn’t their energy be better directed towards worthy goals?“, like keeping gays off of the streets by getting them into the military.


Mischa Barton’s Steamy Smooch

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Jersey Shore Overdose Cover Up: Snooki gets alcohol poisoning

Is Snooki the new Amy Winehouse? Well Amy does have an actual talent, besides a knack for self destruction. Let’s just say make room in rehab!


Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Thrills, spills, chills, & pills!

Kirstie Alley is a big star but not as big as she used to be. Perhaps motivated by dire National Enquirer predictions that she had 4 years to live, the former Fat Actress recently unveiled her new and improved figure – minus 50 pounds!

So that ought’a show the NE! The best part is that she did it without plastic surgery & make up!

sometimes when we touch – if anyone wants me I’ll be taking some time alone to work on my sex tape

Speaking of something to prove, here’s the latest Twitter pic from Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher! The couple have made full use of Twitter ever since they realized you don’t need a career or an image to be a celebrity – only a medium. That’s very McLuhanesque! Now they’re referencing John & Yoko in their latest posting, done straight from bed!

Now wasn’t that something. If they think that should put the cheating rumours to rest then some one ought’a told ’em that trying too hard ain’t very convincing!

doin’ it wrong on the right side of town

Meanwhile prescription pills are once again wrecking havoc in the celebrity community. This time the victim is Last Comic Standing judge Greg Giraldo. Now he’s not dead, but he is in critical condition after over dosing on pills this weekend. He was found unresponsive in his hotel room following a wild party! Here’s the low down on that.

take 2 of these and call me in the morning, if you’re still around

So while Hollywood has made Lindsay Lohan the substance abuse poster girl the ones no one suspected are still dropping like flies. They’re not cashing out on Lohan’s party favours either, but stuff immediately available from the usual disreputable Dr. Murray Conrad type physicians! Considering the shit La Lohan has gotten over her high living life style many more cautious celebs are opting for legal alternatives. That way when the do gooders and interventionists start sniffing around they can smile sweetly and tell them to take it up with the doctor in question. “At least he has a degree – what do you have besides memberships in numerous 12 step programs?” That usually shuts ’em up, reluctantly.

pix courtesy of celebnewswire

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my homeopath told me to give up red meat & goof balls!

The down side is that celebs are more likely to buy the farm using ill gotten legal meds then the safer illegal drugs. Still you can’t blame them for playing the angles after Lohan got made a public spectacle example of. Many professional celebrities would like to preserve their careers and stay out of jail. However it does make you think that the real problem some substance abusing celebrities have is the good intentions of those trying to help them, rather than the substances they resort to for some relief from the madness. Amatuer therapy is becoming an even greater plague to American society than amateur sleuthing. Note to any potential bulls in the china shop out there – leave it to the pros, no matter how greater you need to meddle or interfere, ’cause even of the pros don’t know any better than you, at least they have better malpractice insurance!