Chris Brown goes to rehab

It’s been up and down for Chris Brown lately. For one thing Chris got into a punch up just out side Washington’s W Hotel. That happened when a couple of guys tried to photobomb Chris. A homophobic remark got made, push came to shove, and then 20 year old Parker Issac Adams claimed that Chris had broken his nose, after punching him and knocking him the ground.

Now that’s bad because Chris is already on probation for that 2009 incident with his then girlfriend Rihanna. It was the day of the Oscars and things got out of control on a car ride. So he got charged for beating her up. This new charge could’ve added some serious trouble to that in the form of a 4 year jail term. That’s cause Chris was charged with a felony arrest. It’s since been reduced to misdemeanor simple assault.

A show of good attitude never hurts. So the reduction may have had something to do with Brown’s decision to enter rehab. It’s a sign that some one is starting to take responsibility for themselves on some initial level. Of course many celebs who do rehab mea culpe are half hearted and with mix motives. it often takes repeated rides on the merry go round before it starts to stick. Whatever Brown’s motives he said via a statement that he has elected to enter a rehab facility, & that his goal is to gain insight into his past and recent behavior, and to enable himself to peruse his life and career from a healthier vantage point. His attorney Mark Geragos dropped him off at rehab sometime on Oct 29. Hopefully it’s not one of those dubious ‘celebrity rehabs’ with the awful results.

Xenia Seeberg is bound and gagged in her panties during an early appeance in german film Knockin on Heaven's Door
Xenia Seeberg is in a sexy bind

BTW here’s a special Wondertrash treat for the Xenia Seeberg fans out there. Xenia was best known for playing a sexy space alien on LEXX but got her start much earlier in Europe. One of her first appearances was in Knockin on Heaven’s Door, in which she plays a police officer. She appears about 45 mins in. Just look for the bound and gagged chick in her bra and panties. Told you it was a treat. Bad news is that the movie is in German or something.

wondertrash
Advertisements

Tori & Dean Sex Tape???

Pam Anderson’s Powergirl hair now matches her Powergirl boobs

What’s new with Pamela Anderson. She’s been seen out in public with Rick Salomon. He’s bone of her ex husbands. They’re apparently back together or something. She recently told Ellen DeGeneres she & Rick are best friends with benefits, and that she doesn’t want to meet anyone else because he’s such a  great guy. She’s also training for the New York City Marathon. Pammy says that the 1st mile is worst but now she looks forward to her workouts. Maybe more importantly Pam cut her long blonde trademark tresses. So what does Pam look like in short hair?? Smeothing like this:

Pamela Anderson has been busy lately - she's back with Rick Salomon, she's running the New York City Marathon, and she got her hair cut
Has Pamela Anderson stolen Charlize Theron’s Hair?

When you think of Pamela Anderson the second thing you think of is long blonde hair. Not only does her new do look good on her, but now she’s set for the part of Powergirl in any upcoming comic based projects!

What do Pam Anderson and Powrgirl have in common? Great hairdo’s & unbridled blonde boobage!

Covergirl Nicole Kidman gets Gwyneth Paltrow off of the Vanity Fair hook

In other news Gwyneth Paltrow has gotten a reprieve from Vanity Fair. They were gonna put her on the cover in what was being billed as an epic take down. No one was sure what they had, or thought they had, on Paltrow but the rumours were flying fast and furious – Paltrow hexed Madonna in a Hollywood voodoo ritual, Paltrow cooks meth in a backyard still when she’s not busy working on GOOP, and she sold state secrets to her country’s enemies. It was real outrageous shit but you know how it is once the rumour mill starts spinning it’s wheels.

So anyone waiting for the beans to get spilled is gonna be disappointed. VF didn’t out Paltrow on the cover as anticipate, or threatened.  Nor is she featured inside. Nicole Kidman graces the cover. Now people might have been waiting of rth big tell all on Gwyneth but Kidman sounds game. She talks about her marriages and threatens to go down in flames if she has to! Inside are a range of article from the worlds most endangered tribes to the Vatican, Wall Street, & Sandy Hook. As for Ms Paltrow’s alleged sins and iniquities, it looks like those are gonna have to wait a while. There’s no sign of anything in the December VFair.

NIcole Kidman beat out Gwnyeth Paltrow for the coveted Vanity Fair cover, and they've also shelved their little expose on the actress
Nicole Kidman beats out Gwyneth Paltrow for the Vanity Fair cover

Spelling it out – sex & video tapes with good angles

Tori Spelling has gotten herself into a sticky situation over a stolen sex tape that she made with her husband, and you can read about it in her new autobiographical memoir entitled Spelling It Like It Is
Guess who’s got a sex tape!

In other news Tori Spelling and her husband Dean McDermott had their sex tape stolen. Tori reveals that they did it back in 2009 because Dean thought that it would be a good idea. So they set up their little tripod and had at it. After Tori reviewed the tape and since her angles were good she allowed him to keep it.  After that it was only a matter of uploading their little home made prono tape to their computer. Somempasswoird protection might’ve been nice, as it turned out.

Seems that the computer with the sexy video was stolen by a friend. Tori and Dean knew nothing of this until about 2 years alter when they caught word that someone was shopping the video around. Naturally Tori was horrified. Sot here was a trip to the lawyers, a cease and desist order, and then everything went away right up and until the thing leaked out. Well according to radaronline it leaked!

It’s good that Tori tells this too. Even if this is about 4 years after the fact. For one thing Tori has a brand new book coming out. It’s a memoir called Spelling It Like It Is. I’d have called it Spelling It Out! No one asked me. Anyway with Tori’s book coming out she’s bound to get more public attention. Now with the sex tape issue already out no one is gonna get blindsided. So it’s very responsible of her.

Of course it might also help hype the book. People will wonder what other mischief she’s been up to. Then they might possibly buy the book to find out. I mean if she spills this in an interview how good must the book be? Just think of the 91210 inside tattle! If she can work Brian Austin Green and Megan Fox into it then she’s got a PR slam dunk! So when the responsible thing to do also pays it’s a win win!

half baked and a little cracked

Meanwhile remember to keep reading Wondertrash, the blog that brings you recycled gossip almost daily, and has it’s sex tape in the works!

Wondertrash: Gossip that wears it’s spurs!

wondertrash

Get ahead of the twitter curve

If you ain’t following Condola Rashad on twitter yet then you might wanna start. She’s the daughter of legendary TV mom Phylicia Rashad (Dr Heathcliff Huxtable’s better half on The Cosby Show). She’s been in numerous movie and TV roles, and Tony nominated twice. She’s Juliet opposite Orlando Bloom in Romeo and Juliet (Ain’t he a bit old to play Romeo?). Now they’re currently involved as Bloom finds love on the rebound from Miranda Kerr with his costar. Orlando says that he’s wild about the way she kisses! Or as Orlando says via the Mail –

‘We sometimes get applause after our first kiss because it just goes on and on,’ he told a US talk show. ‘Sometimes I’m like, “I’m not letting go.”’

Condola has been equally enthusiastic in her praise, declaring: ‘What’s funny is we didn’t have to force it.
‘We had a connection from the minute we met, a sense of comfort. We’ve built the relationship we have just by being around each other.’


Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Fashion gets "racy"

Panic at the Disco

like Gary Larson's the Far Side, celebrity gossip has it's own kind of horror, like the horror of MIlan's Halloweek which turned out even worse than the name might imply. Some high powered fashion types turned out to the Disco Africa themed party wearing blackface, others showed up wearing slave chains
Horror & the transmundane

Celebrities like to set new standards in bad behavior. Call ’em all time lows. Like the time Julianne Hough went out dressed up in blackface because she thought that it would be okay in the right context (which is something like what Dr. Laura Schlesinger thought before she went tilt on the air and then went over to Sirius XM). Since she’s a fan of Crazy Eyes on Orange is the New Black then it was practically a compliment and really a homage. Oh yeah and it also gave her a chance to smirk mischievously for the cameras. Surely no other celebrity would be daft enough to do anything like that, that is outside of Paula Deen in the onset of a sugar coma. Well then if that’s what you really think then you’ve made the mistake of applying common sense standards to a wild and crazy profession. This time their standards of wild and crazy have brought some real celebrity horror just in time for Halloween! It’s not the gothy emo Twilight “You don’t get me – I bite people!” stuff either. It’s much less sullen, and much more shocking and absurd!

Fashion is never tacky, even when it’s tasteless?

Celebrity fashioistas at Milan's Halloweek don blackface as if they didn't know it was offensive
If you must be tasteless, don’t be tacky

Fashion is wild & crazy even by celebrity standards. For one thing the movie industry is localized in Hollywood while the fashion industry is disbursed, as it were, across the globe. So it intersects a number of borders and cultures. Plus is means that you can always get far enough away to get away with something, usually. Take Milan for instance. It’s pretty far away from the USA. If Miss South Carolina from several years back can be believed then most Americans might not be able to find Milan on a map. Any Jay Leno audience member might mistakenly locate it in China, or Australia. Oddly, it was recently located in Africa. At least only for a little while, and then in disco form.

not since the days of Al Jolson

It’s not so much that Milan went to Africa as it brought Africa to Milan, sort of. Milan was having it’s annual Halloweek festival and it was themed Disco Africa. It was a chance to network, dance, and of course dress up. I don’t know how the dancing and networking went but some of the costumes came off a bit tasteless. In fact the party wound up looking like a display of support for disgraced TV chef Paula Deen. What I mean by that is, and to come straight to the point, some of the honoured guests arrived wearing blackface. Just take a look!

caution – racy pictures!

things took a freaky and offensive turn at Milan's Halloweek - is this a morning after disaster, or a lack of basic good sense?
things took a freaky and offensive turn at Milan's Halloweek - now even Archi Bunker onj All In The Family back in 1975 knew that this was just plain wrong
things took a freaky and offensive turn at Milan's Halloweek - so next year they're gonna ask Tila Tequila to host - Tila will make trouble but only the kind you expect
things took a freaky and offensive turn at Milan's Halloweek - Steffano Gabbana kept it classy but Alessandro Dell'Acqua got out of hand

So there you have it blackface, chains, guys singin’ “Mammy”, the whole sad sorry spectacle. At the very least it’s ‘borderline’ politically incorrect. At worst hurtful and offensive. Not that everyone was tearing around in KKK mode or anything. Most people kept it cool and copacetic. Like Vogue Japan editor Anna Dello Russo, & Dolce & Gabbana’s Steffano Gabbana, while others like designer Alessandro Dell’Acqua got ‘racy’.

‘You got me wrong – I was doin’ a retro thing!’

Some people ask “What’s the harm in it?” Julianne Hough claims that her blackface was in homage to a beloved TV show.  We don’t know what excuses the Milan Halloweek crowd have. twitter has so far been strangely silent on the matter. Perhaps there will be an announcement about how things were taken out of context and no offense was meant. Then thing is that even in the 70’s, and as early as 1975 – people knew this shit was wrong. I know that because I have documentary video evidence that even in 1975 some kind of awareness and sensitivity was beginning to dawn. Maybe it was only in TV sitcom form, but that’s why we have the proof now. So don’t knock sitcoms! They’re a great genre.

Those were the them there days

Anyway the proof come sin the form of an old All In The Family episode entitled Birth of a Baby. That’s the one where Archie is all excited about taking part in a minstrel show with the boys at his slightly bigoted lodge. Mike tries to explain to him that it’s ignorant. Archie won’t listen. For one thing no one listens to Mike because he’s a loud mouthed snook, or a meat head, as Archie calls him. Basically he’s a know it all with a big mouth and an opinion on everything (and born way too soon to blog!). Besides Archie is set in his ways which is good enough when you know your way around.

So when Gloria goes into premature labour Archie is caught off guard and winds up in the hospital emergency ward, still in his stage make up! So for a guy who thinks he knows his way around he gets caught flat footed at precisely the wrong time. Let’s have a look at that 2 part episode which is oddly enough, almost as timely even in this day and age.


So if you can’t find it in your heart to abstain from such hateful displayed out of human decency, then at least do it because this is the age of Twitter & Instagram. That means no one is safe and in a way Marchall McLuhan never explicitly warned us about (although he did mention something about privacy becoming irrelevant, or “obsolete” as he called it, in a new info based electric global village). So if you can’t be honest about it then at least be on your best behavior – or this Halloween could be more trick than treat. Meanwhile sit back and wait for the next celebrity offender.
When celebrities reach new all time lows with their absurd and offensive behaviour, Wondertrash is there to keep and eye on them
Wondertrash as an eye on you!

wondertrash

Morning After Disasters & Sunday Cinema!


a morning after disaster

Have you ever been to one of those holiday parties, maybe dranbk too much, looked at the Polaroids the following day and thought “Ugh was I nuts?”.Julianne Hough might be doing that right now! She is a big fan of Orange is the New Black. That’s the female inmate prison show. Hough is particularly fond of a Orange character called Suzanne Crazy Eyes Warren. So Hough thought that it would be just spiffing to go out to a Halloween party dressed up as her favourite TV character.  That is instead of dressing up as Wonder Woman for instance. Halloween Wonder Woman isn’t as lame as you might think. Comic characters are in right now. Plus there’s all kinds of buzz about some Wonder Woman movie finally getting made. Or she’s gonna be appearing in the new Batman vs Superman movie. Or there’s a new DC Comics animated film featuring Wonder Woman but it’s not gonna be called Wonder Woman. The 2009 animated Wonder Woman as one of DC Comics/Warner Bros highest grossing releases, and ranked 4rth in their comic based projects. So they want to make another. They might as well have called it “Wonder Woman…”. But they’re not using her name in the title. Which some find strange. The point is that Wonder Woman is a perfectly acceptable Halloween costume choice. Plus it would’ve caused a lot less trouble int his case.

Celebrities  in blackface, in this day & age?

Suzanne Crazy Eyes Warren is played by Uzo Aduba. She’s an African American actress. So when Hough went to the Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party on Friday night, she not only wore an orange jumpsuit, but also coloured her face to make herself resemble the TV character – who is black. Naturally that has some people calling her out over wearing “blackface”. Even though Hough looked really no darker than Lindsay Lohan after a coating of fake bake and an hour or so in Chernobyl’s reactor core. Let’s call it Isotope Orange, in honour of the Matt Groening Simpson’s characters who share the same odd hue with Hough.

Ms Hough’s below and ready to go

Now lest you think that I’m exaggerating or something lets have a look at Miss Hough below, tricked up and geared out in an ensemble that’s offensive on oh so many levels.

I’m Twitter sorry, really!

She looks kinda glittery coppery actually. I’m just glad some one thought to photograph it because that’s the kind of memory you wanna hang onto. No word about what got into Hough. The actress, originally a Mormon from Orem Utah, apparently didn’t know that going out in blackface on Halloween. She said so herself via twitter – .‘I am a huge fan of the show Orange Is the New Black, actress Uzo Aduba, and the character she has created,’ she wrote on her Twitter page on Saturday.’It certainly was never my intention to be disrespectful or demeaning to anyone in any way. I realize my costume hurt and offended people and I truly apologize.’ So whether or not Sorry and I Didn’t Know cut it, maybe next year Casamigo’s will have a little Tila with their tequila instead!

 

Chris Brown throws punch & gay slur, allegedly

Speaking of people who make a bad public impression, Chris Brown got into some more trouble recently. Chris was recently down in Washington DC on 15th & K , at the W  Hotel at around 4:30 AM, when when he had some trouble aboard his tour bus. It started innocently enough when a couple of chicks ran up and asked to be photographed with Brown. According to some reports they boarded the bus. Other says the incident happened in front of the hotel.  Brown’s an obliging fellow so he let them. Then 2 guys run up and try to get into the photo. Chris says “I’m not into that gay shit. I’m into boxing.” Then he nails the guy. A scuffle ensues, on the ground. That results with the victim claiming a broken nose and Brown facing a felony assault charge. Brown is still on probation from his Rihanna beating, so this could go as bad as 4 years behind bars. Hopefully he’ll be on Twitter to straighten this out soon!

fun with insurance , & time tables

Now you have to cut Chris some slack. Travel is dicey and sometimes strange things happen when you’re on the road. Like in our Wondertrash Sunday Afternoon Cinema feature – Time Table.  Time Table is the story of a perfect crime, a train robbery pulled off by doctor and his associates.  The used an elaborate plan, but their precise time table eventually tripped them up and allowed an insurance company operative (forerunner of Erin Esuarance & even Joe Mannix)  to track them down. The whole fiasco finally unravels when the mastermind’s well intentioned wife discovers his cash stash and returns it to the train company – and there by foils his one last chance at escape. Keep your eyes peeled for a young Jack Klugman, later to be Quincy ME.


Directed by Mark Stevens, produced by Mark Stevens, written by Aben Kandel (screenplay) and Robert Angus (story), starring Mark Stevens as Charlie Norman, King Calder as Joe Armstrong, Felicia Farr as Linda Brucker, Marianne Stewart as Ruth Norman, Wesley Addy as Dr. Paul Brucker, Alan Reed as Al Wolfe, Rodolfo Hoyos Jr. as Lt. Castro, Jack Klugman as Frankie Page and John Marley as Bobik

wondertrash

Coming Clean with Heidi Fleiss

Sexyback

Long before Justin Timberlake brought sexy back Heidi Fleiss made it a way of life. She was the notorious Hollywood Madam who serviced the likes of Marlon Brando & Charlie Sheen. She ran a stable of hi priced hi end call girls. Their favours might go for as much as $45 000 for a weekend. When  you wanna blow you wad in Hollywood you don’t expect it to come cheap.

Marlon Brando – Energizer Sex Bunny at large

Most of her clients were well heeled so cash wasn’t a problem. For instance Marlon Brando could afford regular servicing. He made a meal of it too. According to Fleiss, Brando loved sex in every shape and position. He also gave her 20 orgasms when ever he was in. Fleiss says she loved having Brando as a client because fat dudes try harder – in her words. In fact she said the the old boy could go on and on for hours – like an Energizer Sex Bunny.

Catching up with Danger Bunny

Agent Erin is a professional Danger Bunny!

On a side note – The Energizer Sex Bunny is an awesome idea that might do for Engerizer what Erin Esurance – the online insurance danger bunny – did for Esurance. That is until Allstate came into the picture, confined Agent Erin to a “museum of advertising” – from which she is yet to escape, and then proceeded to tank Esurance as a company. Good news for the Geico Gecko eh?! If I didn’t know better then I’d assume that Allstate bought a company that then then proceeded to tank not as a shrewd business move, but as some kind of Anti Erin conspiracy. It wasn’t to turn a profit out of Esurance. Erin was a little too fast, so it was only a matter of time before some serious attempts were made to slow her down. She might even be an ideal choice for the Energizer Sex Bunny. However if not her then I definitely see Milla Jovovich doing that, instead of Marlon Brando.

an ideal choice for the Energizer Sex Bunny

Coming clean with Dirty Laundry!

So what’s Heidi up to lately? Well she’s living in a trailer down in Pahrump, New Mexico. She hasn’t had sex in over 2 years, she says. She doesn’t get lonely though because her 20 pet parrots keep her company. Quite frankly Heidi says that she doesn’t care if she never ever has sex again! Just don’t say she’s washed up. For one thing she’s gainfully employed as the owner of a laundromat called Dirty Laundry! So don’t say that she don’t have wit and a sense of humour! Fleiss had to borrow the money to open it, and as she says  – “It doesn’t even pay the bills—but I love it.” Summing her life up Fleiss goes on to  say – “I’m broke, my life is a mess and so am I. But I just couldn’t care less.” Sounds like she’s achieved some kind of zen acceptance at the other end of fame’s long shit tunnel. Now if she wants to start a recycling company then feel free to contact me about use of the name Wondertrash! Go Heidi!

wondertrash

Orlando Bloom & Miranda Kerr Dunzo

Orlando Bloom & Miranda Kerr were one of those celebrity golden couples. He had been in Lord of the Rings. That’s like the Star Wars of it’s generation. So that makes Liv Tyler like Carrie Fischer now or something. The point is that it’s a big deal and the roles are iconic. He’d also been in Pirates of the Caribbean. That’s a franchise, like Twilight or The Fast and the Furious. Lord of the Rings and Star Wars are franchises too. Not that POTC is LOTR, but it’s not Twilight either. It’s something in between. A good commercial mix.. So that means it made a whole ton of money. Orlando Bloom is a very successful Hollywood actor.

As for Miranda she was a Victoria’s Secret Angel. Now being a secret angel is nothing like being a secret agent – except that both are required to look good in underwear and travel internationally. A secret angel is an underwear model. That’s a big deal too. Victoria’s Secret model are like the last of hi profile celebrity model’s and include all the biggies in their ranks like Adrianna Lima, Gisele Bundchen, Heidi Klum etc. So she’s one of a special breed. She was also a lead angel. That means she was a star performer and headlined to help promote the brand. She wasn’t some one hidden in the background. She was near the top of her profession. It’s kind of like being one of Charlie’s Angels.

So when Orlando Bloom married Miranda Kerr about 6 years ago people thought “Wow they make an attractive couple”. When you’re young healthy & successful then why wouldn’t you hook up with some one more or less in your league? After staying together long enough to have son Flynn without much public buzz, it looked like they were settling in to a most satisfactory relationship. Trouble with most satisfactory relationships is that in the entertainment industry those are scarcer than hen’s teeth.

There have been rumors about Miranda Kerr & Orlando Bloom for awhile now. Like when she was spotted out with Leo DiCaprio at some party while Bloom was off filming some movie. That got mentioned everywhere and even here. People started asking whether there was trouble in paradise. So Miranda’s mother in law issued an official denial. If anyone asked Miranda was a wonderful girl and Orlando couldn’t be happier with her. Even though Miranda had been spotted out in public without her wedding ring.

Well now the other shoe has dropped. In spite of those official denials from Bloom’s family it has been recently revealed that Bloom and Kerr have been separated for months. They’ve even released an offical joint statement –

Miranda Kerr, left, and Orlando Bloom arrive at the InStyle and Warner Bros. Golden Globe After Party at the Beverly Hilton Hotel this year in Beverly Hills. Picture: AP

“After six years together, they have recently decided to formalize their separation.”
The statement continued, “Despite this being the end of their marriage, they love, support and respect each other as both parents of their son and as family.”

BTW things have been rough for Miranda lately. She’s been dropped as a Victoria’s Secret Angel. There was some buzz over that. There were rumours that she was standoffish & difficult. She even had some issues when other Aussie models were added tot he VS roster. Officially VS sais that she wasn’t selling as well as the other girls so her contract wasn’t being renewed. She wills till appear in the VS catalog “but she doesn’t have to be an angel o do that”.

Downunder Wonder Megan Gale was David Jones No 1

She was also dropped by David Jones down in Oz. They announced that they were replacing her with a younger woman. She’d replaced they long term clotheshorse Megan Gale. After years carrying the bit between her teeth Megan was finally put out to pasture as DJ’s spokes model. That was after she got cast as Wonder Woman in that long abandoned Justice league project. Now who needs modeling when you’re about to be a Hollywood Wonder Woman. So Gale stepped aside in favor of greener pastures and Kerr, who was already a VS big deal. Got signed up as DJ’s new face. It seemed like a good deal for them at the time since Kerr is an interntaional celebrity. Now ever they’ve let her go.

Oh yeah and Kerr was recently turned away from a fashion  show for showing up a little late. So far it looks like things have been taking a real bad turn for her.

wondertrash