Wrestling the Hulk – My Life against the Ropes


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Hogan no hero

According to Linda Hogan her ex husband was a Hulk in more than name only. IN her new book entitled Wrestling the Hulk Linda reveals that she was subjected to every sort of abuse. She was beaten, slapped, pinned to the bed, and once the Hulk even put his hands around her throat. The former Mrs Hulk claims that it was scary. She even told Mattt Lauer that she was afraid she would wind up as a statistic, like Nicole Brown Simpson. Linda then went on to describe some of those incidents:

‘He tore my shirt, held me down on the bed with his hands around my throat. I was always afraid he would kill me in one of his rages. But it was scary. I did not know how far he would go.’

You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry

So what exactly git into the Hulkster, besides his famous combo of prayer, training, & vitamins? According to Linda it was the usual plethora of drugs & steroids which help comprise day to day life for pro wrestling gladiators. According to Linda:

‘Wrestlers had a reason to do every kind of drug and narcotic around and help numb them from the pain of what they were doing.’ she said.
‘Drugs were around, there was a constant flow pain killers inflammatory and a lot of them did take steroids.’
Asked why she did not say anything about the drug use she added: ‘That was not my position to do.
‘As long as he was in the ring and they were being prescribed that was up to him. But it did change him.’

Hulk Smash!

So what made her keep quiet about years of drug fuel abuse and various other mayhem, like serial cheating? Cynics would say that having a new book to promote might have soemthing top do with it. After all, now that her reality TV career has come to an end, she’s kind of hard pressed for opportunities to make ends meet. 25 year old pool boys don’t usually hang with 52 year old pro wrestling molls because they prefer maturity and experience to Victoria Secret swimsuit models. However Linda has another explanation. According to her if she’d said anything about the abuse, then the Hulk’s career would be over! In her own words to Matt Lauer, ‘I was quiet and afraid to say anything,’ she said. ‘Had I said something the carpet would have been pulled from under his career.’ The abuse didn’t stop he from appearing in their reality TV series Hogan Knows Best either. Now that she’s got some independent projects going, she no doubt feels freer about blowing the whistle on the big lug’s brutish ways.

BTW Megan Fox is getting back in the news ever since word broke that Hitler got her fired by way of Steven Spielberg. Michael bay hung int here for her, but you just can’t save some people from themselves. That’s even more true if they’re over sexed young actresses with over active mouths! So the result is that we won’t be getting to see Meggers in the new 3D sequel! To emphasize that point her former co star Shia LaBouef (He’s the sensitive young actor who’s not currently being sued over illicit poker winnings) was on Today to talk about how he was the emotional glue (I used to sniff that stuff back in high school), and how Transformers is even better than the other Transformers, even without Mrs. Foxy!


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Notice how he says that not only is the story better, but that Meggers ‘was’ a friend of his, in the past tense. Man that’s one tough business! Hang in there Meggers, cause I’m sure that there’s work for you. Wonder what people would like to see you in.


Love American Style

look, she thinks she’s people!

After you’ve been a call girl – allegedly (bloggers love that word cause when ever we saying anything libelous we can squeeze it in like “reverse tag” in some school yard game – you’re safe or so you think; depending on whether the other person is playing games too, or if they mean business), a B movie actress, and involved in one of the nastiest ugliest bust ups in recent memory then there are only two options for an encore. You can get Phil Spector to blow your dental work out, or you can write an inspirational memoir. Since Phil is currently out of circulation – he performed one too many encores – Denise Richards has opted for the latter. Her dental work, if not the reading public, thanks her for it too!

staying current

Now like I say Denise has been a busy little beaver who’s had many fingers in her pie – is that the way that saying goes? – but the big thing that makes her interesting instead of merely a curiosity, is her marriage to Warlock Charlie Sheen! That’s because anything Charlie gets close to becomes interesting. When he hooks up with some random slut, the gal becomes a Twitter celebrity over night. When he goes on Livestream everyone watches. Now Anthony Weiner has resigned via livestream, even though before Charlie no one other than hard core nerds even knew what the fuck Livestream was. Personally I think that Weiner should never have resigned. He ought to have flipped the fuck out, forced some kind of impeachment, then turned around and sued for breach of contract! Weiner’s no warlock. He’s no Bill Clinton either. Clinton got caught with his finger in the cookie jar and he didn’t step aside for worthier lesser men like Al Gore. Clinton himself might have quipped “I ain’t resigning, I get more skin as President!

Just call him “Dick Cox”!

It could’ve been worse. Weiner’s first name could’ve been “Dick” Then Conan O Brien would’ve had an aneurism. Back to the topic at hand. Sheen managed to make even a brain dead slut like Denise Richards interesting which God knows must qualify him as some kind of warlock. Denise did make some contributions during the divorce, moistly through her stupid vicious scheming. If you’ll recall she accused Charlie of being into ‘borderline porn’, claimed that he was addicted to pills that he got online – also the source of his porn, and that his brains were addled with conspiracy theories picked up from people like Alex Jones and David Icke. For those who don’t know abut Icke he’s the former Brit sportscaster who now makes a living telling people that the Queen of England is a giant shape shifting lizard. That makes Icke interesting too, if only because a bad acid trip, again allegedly, completely shape shifted his life! You can read more about Mr. Icke and his ilk on our other other blog Area 51! As for the interesting Denise, she also got laughed out of a judges office after asking for an emergency hearing because she said her girls were touching themselves funny after returning from a visit to their father’s (and they still keep Tila Tequila in the dog house!).

Take that jealous haters! Anyhow the whole Denise and Charlie thing was a case of push coming to shove with a vengeance. People were calling it the divorce of the century basically because they were trying to be optimistic. We were really waiting for the shit to really hit the fan & the whole scenario to go OJ Simpson! It might have – depending on whether or not Charlie is really as allegedly crazy as he allegedly pretends – if Denise hadn’t taken some time out from all the pressure of being a full time professional bitch to go and mess up her BFF Heather Locklear’s marriage to Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora.

To fill you in on that inspirational episode in the amazing life of Ms Richards: basically she was busy screwing the cock off of Sambora while Sambora’s wife Locklear was wandering around all drunk and dazed and unsuspecting. Denise decided to take the game to the next level basically because she probably thought that busting up Locklear’s marriage would be like taking candy from a drunken comatose baby! So she left some sexy e mails about what a stud and a winner Sambora was on Sambora laptop where Heather was sure to find them.

Sure enough Heather did. She sued for divorce and then went on a major bender alcoholic relapse of David Hasselhoff proportions. The result was that Locklears years of secret drinking came out in the open as well as Denise’s on the side slutting around. Denise claimed that she was just trying to make herself feel better because her mother was dying of cancer – call that the John Edwards Defense. Perhaps that’s why people forgave Charlie when come colourful phone messages of him ranting about Denise’s “dead mom” got released, no doubt by Denise herself. Denise is all heart, if her heart is between her legs and has herpes – allegedly. People also seemed to forgive Richards too. You’d have taken a dog to the vet for behavior like that but most people started giving Denise credit for being more intelligent than they thought. Just like Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.

So the upshot is that for a bleached brained tramp Denise has done enough to fill up several tabloid type bios. None of it was very inspirational, unless you were a staff writer for Arron Spelling, in which case you were probably taking notes! However life moves on. Charlie got involved with his slut de jour Brooke Mueller who was pretty much a Denise Part Duex. Denise did some quick calculations – even the dumbest slut is capable of basic math if you just tack some dollar signs in front of the numbers (Shit I think that some of these tramps could solve equations for Stephen Hawking if you just put the “$$” in the right places) – and realized that she was making her money from alimony payments and not divorce settlements. That meant she had to build him up, so he would be well liked and earn more money for her, instead of tearing him down so people wold blame him and make a judge give his money to her. So suddenly Charlie was a wonderful man and an incredible father who didn’t look at underage porn or cause his daughter’s to act funny after unsupervised visits.

Not that’s a lot of about turns to keep up with but people managed. They must of because Deni$e seemed to be getting some credit for being something other than a soulless rapacious whore. She was interviewed on TV talk shows and treated with respect, interested of ridicule and derision. People asked her if she were losing any sleep over Charlie. Basically they were acting like she had genuine thoughts and feelings instead of a bundle of nasty, insistent little urges and drives (the difference between people and psychopaths). It was getting to the point where soon they might begin asking her who she supported for president, or what she thought about the environment!

Now when you’ve spent significant portions of your life on your knees with your mouth open (allegedly) this kind of credibility, and even respect, is a little different. You’re just not used to people treating like a person instead of a burnt out fuck doll with a grudge. It’s a glimpse into how the other half live that can turn your head a bit. Hell, Denise got right carried away. The poor fuck for brains probably even started thinking thaty she was actually in love with Charlie or something, after so much unaccustomed positive reinforcement. So this positive reinforcement has some side effects. Basically it’s sent Denise out fishing for more – praise and of course money – by writing a new book!

wonder woman the unauthorized biography

The book is not gonna be a tell all – in Denise’s case all would be too much to tell for any mere book, though you can find much of it in back issues of your favorite super market shit rags, or even in this very blog! Denise is billing it as – wait for it and try not to faint – an ‘inspirational’ memoir. At least that’s what she’s telling the good people over @ Radaronline! Now it might be inspirational to know that Denise actually can write, like Vanna White when she put out her inspirational memoir several years back. Denise maintains that her unsuspected literacy skills aren’t the only thing that makes this inspirational. She wants to tell the world about he ove story – a love story with Charlie that ‘became what it became’. Says Denise:

“I get into the good stuff about my marriage, because people have only read the rotten stuff,” she said, describing the content of the book which is due for release on July 27.
So, you know, there was a beautiful love story between he and I and then it went the way it went. But I talk more about how I felt during that time, because I think a lot of women can relate to that going through a divorce and custody and being a single parent, trying to work and all that stuff.”

“Well it’s not a tell-all, but it’s hopefully something that’s inspiring. I went through a whole lot and I get asked a lot of questions about that time in my life, so I figured I would write my story and hopefully anyone that has been, you know, dealing with challenges will know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.”

“But the thing is I’ve dealt with it for a very long time, so it’s not new for us. It’s just new for other people. But as far as the media, I protect my children from that. I don’t keep the news on when they’re around.”

“I have gotten a lot of nice messages on Twitter. Very supportive people and it means a lot.”

So there you have it – due out on the 27th. Some fine reading that ought to make too. You have only yourselves to blame. That is those of you who allegedly sent those nice messages on Twitter. You shouldn’t have encouraged her. Now you’ll just have to put up with this dose of inspiration. That is unless you’ve read today’s Wondertrash post imn which case you’ll have gotten the inspirational highlights of Denise’s life of crime. Then you can save your money instead of giving it to that awful woman!

PS. Shannon Tweed walked out on Gene Simmons during an episode of Joy Behar, after calling him a pig. Now only yesterday it was pointed out right here on Wondertrash that they were a little to comfortable doing interviews together for a couple on the verge of a blowout. Their was more tension between James Garner and Mariette Hartley back in those old Polaroid One Step commercials from many years ago. Anyway Shannon has taken her bid for credibility to the next level, and just after the post too. I guess that we know of one TV Bunny who reads Wondertrash!

Now here’s a little more on that whole MK Ultra Monarch Mind Control thing that has been plaguing Hollywood! This time it has to do with Harry Potter selling sex, which was supposed to be Twilight’s job according to Emma Hermione Watson. No wonder the kids at Brown gave her such a hard time – insufferable little twat, allegedly!


Jesse James threatens to write book – anti climax expected!

running out of tiger blood!

After taking a few days off to mourn Charlie Sheen’s gradual return to sanity – God that man came up with some interesting shit! – I’m back to dish, though with much less inspiring shit to work with. For those of you afraid that it has something to do with Justin Bieber’s hair, or Kim Kardashian revealing she has had silicone injections but won’t say where, don’t worry. I can offer livelier fare, but it ain’t much liver.

who’s who

Today’s offering involves a gal more sympathetic than Jennifer Aniston. IN fact she’s only slightly less sympathetic than Rihanna! This chick would be none other than America’s Sweetheart – well one of ’em anyway. The whole America’s Sweetheart deal is kind of like the Heavy Weight Boxing Championship: there’s about a half dozen belts on the go and the public has lost interest. She’s also one of the reining Queens of Romcoms; I guess that’s kind of like the Heavyweight Sweetheart deal. Anyway it’s not Katherine Heigl, but poor humiliated Sandy Bullock.

if you can’t find fresh freaks then send in the clowns

If you’ll recall about a little over a year ago Sandy was on top of the world. She had a blockbuster film career, a skeezy tattooed husband with a pick up truck for the kind of ‘real people‘ credibility Angelina Jolie hasn’t had since she stopped wearing billy Bob Thornton’s blood around her neck, real affection from the movie going public, oh yeah and she had that Oscar in her hot little hand too. It looked like everything was coming up Sandy, until the shit hit the fan.


The shit hit the fan in the form of her husband’s sleazy mistress Michelle Magee. Magee was nicknamed Bombshell – at least that was her working name, and she was the sort of greasy bitch that Tiger Woods wouldn’t have touched with a shitty stick wrapped in an asbestos condom. Not unless he was on his usual Ambien & Viagra cocktail anyway. What Bombshell worked at was stripping and posing for fetish websites. By fetish think vomit and dog shit. It’s all about what don’t wash out! So the chick had a serious career she was working on, with white power and home wrecking as a sideline. All work and no play will leave people asking “why is there stale vomit in your hair?

Vanilla Gorilla makes a monkey out of Bullock!

The shit couldn’t have hit the fan at a worse time either, since as I mentioned people had just watched Sandy pick up her shiny chrome celebrity validation award in a highly televised ceremony. Sandy had been waiting for this moment for a very long time – ever since she wanted to be an actress when she grew up – so she made a big deal out of it. Unfortunately she made a big deal out of the Vanilla Gorilla too. She made some public comments about how real he was, how he’d made her more real, and how he was charming the pants off of Morgan Freeman (although hopefully not with some cooked up scheme that involved getting him to bend over!). In short she said he’d made a Hollywood actress a better person – which is no small feat. Then it got too real.

who’s Ricky Gervias?

Hot on the heels of this all these scuzzy photos of Bombshell licking dog vomit up in her under wear while baring her swastika tattoos to the world came up. Apart from maybe Mel Gibson no one was impressed. It made Sandy look lower than all those mentioned at the intro of the last Golden Globes (almost forgot about that since Charlie Sheen’s wild over the top media blow out didn’t you?). The difference was that this shit actually stuck, and for days and days after. What was sticking was a question: If Jesse was really a bad piece of shit, like we’re finding out; and he was really the most important person in Sandy’s life, like she said; then how could she not know about any of this nazi shit? Something smelled rotten, and it wasn’t just the leftovers from some fetish sex orgy; though that might have been part of it.

there’s more to outrage than pretty pretty dresses

Well then if this question has been plaguing your mind, then you’re as socially aware and conscious as Natalie Portman on a pre Oscar clothing spree. So you might also be interested to know that Vanilla Gorilla has a new book coming out. Normally no one would dignify that book with the purchase price. They’d simply wait for the National Enquirer to give them the gist of it, or borrow it from the public library. However this time there’s a very good reason to put our high minded outrage aside and indulge our morbid curiosity. The reason is that Jesse addresses the Sandy question.


According to Jesse in his new book Sandy probably had no idea about his fringe interests in nazism and fetish sex. For one thing she was never really that interested in any part of his life. That included their time in bed together. Jesse claims that bed with Sandy involved books, newspapers, scripts – the kind of shit grease monkeys with Hitler tattoos hate, and as much as 6 dogs. The dogs didn’t even figure in the way he liked either – they were lying affectionately at the foot of the bed, instead of licking fresh maggots out of her vagina! Now Jesse hasn’t come right out and said that she drove him into the arms of sex offenders because she was too damned boring in bed. Gentleman Jesse just left that to be inferred. However some are saying that he has come right straight out and implied that the ex is a lesbian or something, allegedly! Here’s some excerpts of what he did say.

“Jesse would always say that Sandra went to bed with a book or script and five or six of their dogs, leaving little room for him in bed and no chance to have sex,” the source said.

“He also told friend that he and Sandra had zero physical attraction, and they hadn’t had sex for months before they split. Sandra is on edge because Jesse could justify his cheating by creating the false impression that she withheld sex from him or is a lesbian.”

Publishing insiders say that Jesse’s book royalties are tied to how much he reveals about Sandra. She’s agonizing over the possibility that Jesse will spill heartbreaking details of her failure to conceive, and even accuse her of condoning his Nazi fascination.

“Jesse owns a large collection of Nazi memorabilia, including a surfboard with a life-size Hitler doing the Nazi salute that he kept in his office at the garage. He also had swastikas, helmets and Nazi uniforms at the home he shared with Sandra. While Sandra wasn’t a fan of his Nazi stuff, did she turn a blind eye to it? If Jesse tells the world she was OK with his collection, that could come back to haunt her, especially since her late mother was German.”

put the titillate back in tittle tattle!

So that should clear everything up, unless it makes everything a lot more confusing. That’s the problem with tell alls, especially when they tell you nothing. I say if you’re gonna tittle tattle than have the guts and basic honesty to rat out the bastards like a mafia fink trying to get into the witness protection program! That means all bets off, no holds barred, and the Marquis of Queensbury rule book gets tossed right out the window! If not, then don’t waste everyone’s time by getting their hopes up and then pussy footing around ’cause your lawyer told you to be careful and Bullock’s business a manger said “don’t worry something can be worked out!” You’re just taking precious work away from Andrew Morton. At least Jesse’s people are still making some noises about a possible Jesse James ‘alleged‘ sex tape. Though it should be said that the alleged tape doesn’t involve Sandra Bullock, but Miss Tila Tequila and a German Sheppard named Shitler! That ought fill some attention in the post Charlie Sheen celebrity outrage vacuum!


Andrew Cunanan was a mafia patsy!

some days

July 17, 1997 started out a good day for fashion king pin Gianni Versace. His ear cancer was in remission and his latest AIDS test was negative. However life was to go from good to bad to dead quick enough. As Versace opened the gates to his Miami spread he was shot from behind in the head and neck. Witnesses on the scene found the designer lying in a pool of his own blood with his face blown off. A dead pigeon was near by, and a well known young man was spotted fleeing the scene.

“I’m so mad I could go on a 5 state killing spree!”
~Cunanan’s favorite expression when mad

The young man was infamous serial killer Andrew Cunanan. Cunanan was a bright and ambitious young man who chose the life of a gay escort as a short cut to the top. By servicing the rich, famous, and gay he got admission to a world it might ordinarily have taken him years if not decades to get to on his own merits (Cunanan was a border line genius with a 149 IQ – so he probably might have got there on his merits eventually). So Mr Cunanan was often scene in the comapny of wealthy older business and political types. Some where along the way the life of wine and roses went off the rails, and when the world learned of Cunanan he’d ‘gone ballistic’ and was wanted for the deaths of 4 men. This was prior to the Versace killing – by the time Versace was killed the public had already been asking “who’s next?’

Miami Vice

No one is sure what Cunanan’s motive for killing Versace might have been, except that the two vaguely knew each other. They’d attended some of the same parties together – Versace was well known around the Miami hot spots and used to solicit companions for the evening by going into gay strip clubs and learning at the dancers. When they turned up their noses at the older man, he’d point at himself and mouth “Versace“. After that they’d line up and Gianni could have his pick!

the day the shit hit the fan

As said Versace and Cunanan seemed to have known each other in some way. So the working theory is that when the shit hit the fan Cunanan went in search of some one to help him, like Versace. Versace had a boat and tons of bucks so he was the go to guy if you needed to get out of the country quick. Now folk think that Versace told Cunanan to fuck the hell off when asked for help. That set Cunanan off his pretty little head and provoked another killing, followed by Cunanan’s suicide. Though most folk belive that, some others think different.

that’s a morte

Others in this case is Italian journalist Gialuigi Nuzzi. He’s the author of a new book on the infamous Versace killing, and has pointed out that there were some irregularities in the case. Like that dead pigeon. A dead pigeon left at the scene of a day time killing, according to Nuzzi, is the traditional calling card of the Mafia. in fact it’s where we get the phrase “stool pigeon” from. So the dead pigeon would seem to poitn to some one other than Cunanan as the killer.

low friends in high places

Now Nuzzi should know a thing or two about the mafia ’cause he’s got plenty of friends in the business. Friends like Giuseppe Di Bella. Di Bella is a sort of godfather figure in the Italian mob with a reputation for veracity with the authorities. In fact Italian coppers say that he ain’t steered ’em wrong yet! Di Bella’s says that Versace got mixed up with a bad guy named Franco Coco Trovato. Trovato’s bag was laundering money for South American drug lords. He’d take a trip down south, pick up some cash, find a semi legitimate business to invest in, then leave said business a piece of the action before spreading the wealth around.

strange bedfellows

According to Di Bella that’s how Trovato knew Versace. Versace was, allegedly, a business associate of Trovato. That association is said to include pumping money into Versace’s business for laundering and eventual return to South America. The fashion industry would come in handy for a South American connection. Now things went wrong, according to informant Di Bella, and corroborated by another mobster – Filippo Barecca -when Versace started skimming. Since Trovato had some very ruthless dudes to answer to, that could be tolerated. So shit happened. The dead pigeon was just the mob’s way of confirming that the job had been done!

vulgar favors

Di Bella insists that Trovato knew Versace well. Trovato was a fashion freak and loved to show off his Versace originals – gifts that had been signed by the man himself. Di Bella also goes on to claim that this arrangement went as far back as 1983-84, when the pair would take vacations,or business trips, together to such exotic locales as Majorca and Brazil! Di Bella also gives Versace the benefit opf the doubt, claiming that the designer may not have realized trovato was amob boss, and so didn’t know where the money came from. Versace may merely have got cute with the wrong guy.

Blood & money down at the bookstore!

In an interesting side note the boat where Cunanan was found dead – allegedly suicide – was owned by a mafioso. Now the authorities didn’t make too much out of that. They had their man, who was dead – so they didn’t even have to go to the trouble & expense of a trial. That’s a big incentive to close the case without asking too many awkward questions. However Nuzzi goes on to hint in his book that Cunanan was set up by the mob as a fall guy, to take the blame for the killing. Nuzzi’s book is called Metastasi, A Chronicle of Blood & Money. That book deals with the Calabrian gang known as N’drangheta – in which Versace allegedly some how got himself mixed up with. For the record Versace’s surviving kin Donatella and Santo vehemently deny this. They even went to court in Sydney, Australia to have a similar book – The Spying Game by Frank Monte – banned. They won that case so who knows how much there is to this beyond a good story. However Nuzzi’s book hasn’t been banned so you should be able to get your hands on it and decide for yourself!

Wondertrash: America’s Most Wanted!


"The Real Diary: Lessons from the Good Time Girl to Champion."

Loredana Jolie is one of countless women that Tiger Woods has had bland, sleazy sex with. She also one of many to cash in on that. Not only in terms of sub sandwiches and hours spent in swanky PGA hotels. Loredana is writing a book. She got some interesting things to say, too.

For instance Tiger Woods is a big shot both figuratively and literally. Says Ms Jolie – As a love and sexual partner he is largely endowed and safe sex with him was definitely champion status.When I was having my relationship with Tiger. I was like on the seventh cloud especially from a sexual perspective. There is at least no doubt about the fact that Tiger was awesome in bed. She also hints that Woods has a dark side. She claims that Woods got off on threesome fantasies. Says Loredana – He liked to watch girl-on-girl, and the girls would occasionally join us. I would make him fantasize,” writes the 27-year-old Bronx-born escort. “I would ask him what if I had another guy here with me while he was there with me. It kind of turned him on a little.

Woods’ dark side extended well beyond mild kink. According to Loredana Woods’ was addicted to pills. Apparently he had a sleep disorder that kept him up most nights. That lead to reliance on medications such as Ambien – believed to have contributed to Woods’s ex mad ways. Tiger was kind of addicted to pills, I saw him taking sleeping pills and painkillers. He had a severe sleeping disorder and he could not sleep at night,she says.

Perhaps her most interesting comments related to the Tiger Woods marriage. For instance she knows exactly why the marriage collapsed. Now it’s not the most obvious reasons, like Tiger’s promiscuity or even her own intrusion. The reason is because Elin Nordgren was an icy bitch who was more interested in running around spending Tiger’s money that in keeping her champion husband serviced. Says LoredanaObviously they didn’t have such a close relationship because if I was in his house where the hell was she?” she rants. “If I had my husband, I would make sure I know [who] was coming to my house. At that point I started realizing it was more a less [sic] financial reasons why they were married — she was in it for the money.

Naturally Loredana has a book coming out. It’s called “The Real Diary: Lessons from the Good Time Girl to Champion.” It also recounts some o her good times with high rollers like Michael Jordan and Bruce Willis . She also makes more bizarre claims, such as My diary also reveals intimate secrets and details that can save millions [of] people worldwide. I have slept with some of the wealthiest and most powerful people on the planet.So if you want to read more about her adventures with Tiger Woods, and other super heroes, then be sure to look for that books.

BTW for those following the bizarre story of Oscar nominated actor Randy Quaid and his allegedly crazy wife, Wondertrash readers will be relieved to hear that the couple have been apprehended. The Quaids began their life of crime by running afoul of the law in an odd way. The pair began ripping off B&B’s throughout America. They left 10 000’s in debt behind them.


The pair eventually made their way out of the country and into Vancouver Canada, where they were arrested outside a city bank. Quaid had gone in to raise some funds by mortgaging a property. Living on the lam ain’t cheap, even when you don’t pay your bills. When the bank ran his name through their computer up came a notice that he had an outstanding warrant in the USA. So the police were notified and both Quaid and his wife were arrested as the left the bank.


The Quaid saga might be pretty strange, and might even get stranger yet, but it’s not the strangest thing going on out there. For some really out of this world news here’s the latest broadcast by Gary Bell & The View From Space!



French Pres Married to a Whore

Carla the Ambitious

https://i2.wp.com/image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2008/06/12/carla460ready.jpgAccording to former journalist, turned biographer, Besma Lahouri, French 1st lady Carla Bruni’s past was so checkered that she needed an extensive media make over.The make over tried to create a likable and even demure Bruni. The real Bruni is a ambitious woman who’s agenda’s set herself as no 1 priority. She’s a woman who has been described as a “female Don Juan“. She’s also been described as solitary, capricous, and demanding. How demanding? Well she forces her husband French President Nicolas Sarkozy to socialize with her ex lovers for one thing. There are a lot of ex lovers.

20 odd years

Now the singer/model has gotten around in the past 20 odd years. She was pursuing a career as a singer – not very credibly – so she slept with anyone who could help her a long the path. That’s normal in the music biz. These wern’t just no names she was gettin’ it on with either. She’s been bedded by such sundry paramours as Eric Clapton and Sir Mick Jagger! Many of these people keep popping up again and again in the lives of France’s 1st couple. Says author: “Since he married the woman that some called a ‘man-eater’, (Mr Sarkozy) has to put up every day with this burdensome tribe. Singers, philosophers, lawyers, bosses, men of the press or politics.” They often show up at Bruni’s Riveria Villia. Tedious dinner parties with your spouse’s wind bag ex lovers sounds like some kind of existentialist mightmare!

an empty shell

Lahouri does more than dish up dirty details. The author also shares their insights into Burni’s character. According to the excerpts. Burni’s character might be inferred to be “whorish”. Of course the “maneater” crack got made. Some other stuff got said, too. Stating that “I did not set out to be unkind but to reveal what she really is… The image of Carla Bruni is totally false,” the author then describes Bruni as “attractive and impetuous, free and calculating… faithful in friendship and fickle in love” (Add “psychopathic” & “oversexed” and she could be a bond girl!). Now that pretty much is the public perception of Bruni, but Lahouri get’s more specific. For one thing Bruni’s foundation to fight AIDS is a sham! Lahouri’s exact words are “an empty shell“. Looks good on her resume though.

Coming out Carla: touched & retouched

Not that Bruni can be blamed for that. When she started going with Sarkozy, she got all kinds of advice about cleaning up her “rock groupie” image. Bruni herself had warned that “they are going to say a lot of things about me, about my past life. Things, photographs are going to come out!” So that lead presidential aide Pierre Charon onto a Henry Higgins trip. His mission was to turn a Madonna Like over ambitious aspiring singer music groupie into a creature of effortless chic. That transformation involved a world wind romance and a total image make over! The image make over also included extensive plastic surgery. Fortunately Bruni had a guy on hand – she’s been seeing a Paris plastic surgeon for 20 years! Bruni has always denied getting touch ups.

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the kind of a gal who if told nude pix of her were coming out might ask how recent they were and whether or not she looked good in them

As for Charon, he’s still guarding the image. He personally tried to deter Lahouri from writing her book. There were no ugly threats; he merely opined that the life of Ms Sarkozy was just “too complicated” for a bio treatment. That didn’t deter Lahouri from her exhaustive 2 year investigation into Bruni. What emerged was a picture of Bruni as one of a new group of public persons; the political celebrity (what’s a political celebrity? They’re some one who set out to be famous and found themselves in politics by chance. Think Sarah Palin, who wanted to be a sportscaster.). It’s the story of an ambitious woman who was determined to rise in the world one way or another; and who might as well have been come to public attention as a Mrs Eric Clapton than as a political wife. Carla herself doesn’t seem like a woman who was too particular about how she got there. She might have been just as much at home in a reality TV series as in the Elysee Palace. Carla, A Secret Life is due out later this month!

PS Ms Bruni – Sarkozy seems to evoke almost as much excitement as Sarah Palin. Perhaps some people hold her rock music background against her now that she gone legit and entered the world of politics without having to organize a benefit concert and get knighted. Rock music does have a reputation; one that’s almost as bad as politics. So I guess that the moral of the story is that if you must get involved in show business, then do it using an alter ego, to protect you secret identity.

Secret identities are very important and even more so if you’re famous. Apart from the good fun of sneaking around, getting away with shit, and taking off clothes in odd places; it affords a layer of personal privacy that often gets stripped away when you step out of the day to day world and into the glass house for the sake of fortune & whatever.

Besides, all the golden and silver age Hollywood stars had ’em. Tony Curtis was really Bernie Schwartz, John Wayne started out as Marion Morrison before he became the Duke – when asked how he got that nickname Wayne explained that as a boy his pet dog was “Duke” and peoples tarted calling him after the dog, and of course Marylin Munroe started out as Norma Jean Baker. It makes you wonder sometimes whether Rock Hudson is buried as Roy Fitzgerald, or under his studio slave name. So remember to keep you super powers under your shirt the next time you go out, or something like the following might happen to you!


Danielle Staub and the naked truth

too naked to make it

Real Housewives of NJ is a popular show and among the cast members Danielle Staub is the most interesting. She’s had a past as a drug mule and was even in on the kidnapping of a man who couldn’t pay his drug debt. The guy owed Staub’s boyfriend some serious money. That lead to him taking an unscheduled trip. The ‘victim reported to police that Staub was right in the room while he was being held hostage. He also says that she was probably too stoned to really be aware of what was goung down.

She’s got her bare facts straight but has she missed the point?

Well now Staub is coming clean on her colourful life. Danni dishes on the Real Housewives, her past as a stripper, plus what it’s like raising children when you’re being featured in a reality TV show. But don’t take my world for it – here’s Ms Staub herself giving the low down on her hi life.


Oprah Bio Author Kitty Kelley Talks About Cold Shoulder

trophy target

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Stalking Oprah

When you go after Oprah Winfrey you’d better go loaded for bear. That’s what Kitty Kelley usually does whenever she writes an unauthorized biography about any of her high profiles targets. now the Queen of dirt wants to add Oprah Winfrey to her trophy collection.

taking the heat over cold shoulder

Kelley has just released her new Oprah book and it appears to follow form with her Sinatra, the Royals, the Bushes, etc. bios. There’s already a lot of talk about drugs, incest, prostitution, homosexuality, Gayle King, and the Kitty Kelley media freeze out! Who knew that Oprah lived such an interesting life?

the Oprah Effect 2.0

Ms. Kelley seems particularly concerned with the freeze out. Usually whenever Kitty writes a tell all, the interviewers line up. Not now. Apparently Oprah is using her massive influence, the kind she used to make Dr Phil, Dr Oz, and Rachel Ray household names, to keep Kitty off of the talk show circuit. Of course that hasn’t stopped people from talking about it. Quite the contrary! Here’s a little news clip featuring Ms Kelley discussing her unauthorized book and it’s unofficial reaction.

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fame in the sleaze age

Oprah should’ve realized the day that Tom Cruise hopped off her couch and into celebrity crazytown that no one can control their own image in the information age. What’s more fame can turn on you to the point where everyone can cash in on your secrets, except you. Sandra Bullock could’ve explained that sad fact to her. So will you be lining up for your copy of the book that promises to tell you about the real Oprah? I’m sure that Tom Cruise already has his advance copy – complete with special deleted chapters. Fame still has it’s privileges – though it’s a much bigger pain in the ass than it used to be.

“Despite your effort…
despite your might…
you cannot escape…
from Oprah’s sight…”

Just because Oprah is freezing Kelley out of the talk show circuit doesn’t mean that Oprah is unaware of the book’s existence. Oprah directly addressed the book recently at the Matrix Awards. While Oprah skipped the usual red carpet, she did launch into the book, describing it as a ‘so called’ biography.

Then she went right into a spiel about her mysterious BFF Gayle King. Oprah said that King had her hands full with all of Oprah’s new biodads coming out of the work work. They probably want a piece of the action, or at least one of those new cars Oprah is so fond of giving away. Oprah then went on to describe Gayle as a wonderful friend who cares more about Lady O than she does her self, and who has never ever been jealous of Oprah no not one day in her life (except for an incident involving Oprah and Tina Turner!). Complete dog like devotion is all that any celeb asks from their companions and that’s a tall order when you’re so full of yourself positivity. That level of positivity usually brings out the worst in people.

Oprah’s final word on the book – “This to shall pass.”

Oprah might be on to something with the “this to shall pass” idea – even though it’s not original. As previously posted right here on Wondertrash Mad Mel Gibson has split from his Russian sugartits Oksana Grigorieva shortly after the birth of their child Lucia. It’s even worse than that, Oksana is having her Mel tattoo removed. The tattoo in question is a small hammer & sickle on her ankle that Mel advised her to get. Who knew Mel’s mind worked that way? No word on whether or not she’s having the 10 pounds of facial filler removed.

One thing that isn’t passing is the trouble Suvivor producer Bruce Beresford-Redman is in. He got in trouble after the murdered body of his wife Monica was found stuffed into a sewer outside their Mexican hotel. Naturally police assumed he did it. Even more so now that new rumors of mutual infidelity have come out. Head over to Celebrity Bitchslap for a little more on that.

Bruce Beresford-Redman: Did Mutual Infidelity lead to murder?

Bogus zen: Celebrities have a head for heights, unfortunately many of them haven’t learned the fine art of taking a fall. Tom Cruise didn’t even managed to make the 2 foot hop from Oprah’s couch unscathed (he only damaged his ego, but when you’re a Follywood celebrities that’s one of your most important assets!). So here now is a Wondertrash thought of the day: Remember that it’s better to be on the ground wising that you were flying, than flying and wishing you were on the ground.


Going Rogue with a vengance

Sarah Palin’s back and with a personal agenda like Lee Marvin in Point Blank instead of a platform for America


So what’s Sarah Palin doing writing a book besides getting attention and making tons of cash? Well for one thing she’s got plenty of old scores to settle with her former Republican Party cronies. You can probably guess that the John McCain team is at the top of that hit list. Then there’s the media though by media she mainly means Katie Couric. I don’t know why Katie Couric should get singled out since many of the ‘liberal media’ pretty gleefully pulled the flesh off Palin by the handful. Well if anyone thought that Sarah might learn her lesson and go away quietly then they have some serious rethinking too do. Not only is the former VP candidate back for more, this time she’s back with a vengeance!



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Hulk Hogan’s Life Outside the Ring

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