Conan O’Brian Makes a Crack about Jay Leno’s Last Night

Late Nite TV is a sore spot for many of us & Conan O Brien in particular. You’ll recall that several years ago it was Conan undergoing a much heralded transition into the coveted Tonite Show share. It’s the seat of Jack Parr, Steve Allen, and has been the undisputed throne of Late Nite since the days of Johnny Carson. No one crossed Johnny Carson and lived, up until Arsino Hall.

a hard day’s nite

Anyway once upon a time and sometime after NBC passed over Dave Letterman for Jay Leno has heir to the late nite kingdom, a time had come for the changing of the guard. Leno himself had decided to step down and hand the crown over to his successor Conan. Conan was a smart, funny, and quirky ex writer for the Simpsons. He’d put in an apprenticeship by filling Dave Letterman’s Late Nite spot, after hosting his own late late before that. Conan looked good to go, & there was much ballyhoo.

NBC hits the panic button

Well ratings weren’t everything that NBC expected right away. So they got nervous. Maybe Conan was too nerdy to go beyond his own niche audience? So instead of giving him a grace period to get settled in – as they famously did to shows like Cheers that struggled through a couple of seasons before hitting their stride, they flipped the chicken switch and brought Leno back. I guess the thinking was that things couldn’t be any worse.

Don’t blame Jay! Even Napoleon got one shot off from exile!

Well some hard feelings developed. Conan was banished from TV for about 9 months, or something. He was still allowed to perform live. So he took to twitter to vent. He got a lot of followers who wanted to support him too. They were Team Coco or something. Everybody got the idea that something dirty had gone on so it left a bad taste in everyone’s collective mouths. Then CoB’s TV interdiction ran out, he got a show on cable, and everyone quickly forgot. Public outrage is surprisingly fickle some times! Either that or corporate policy is prone to backfire.

Now Jay is retiring again. No one knows whether it will stick this time. He’s picked Jimmy Fallon to replace him. Fallon has a really good track record. He’s a Saturday Night Live alum. So that’s like being a graduate of the Harvard School of Comedy or something. He’s smart, funny, & credible with the audience. So he looks good to go! Yet you can’t blame Conan for having a little something to say about it. & here that is!

So the only question is what’s Leno gonna do with his retirement this time around? In case many of you are expecting another surprise return, like Lt. Colombo who returns to the scene of the crime so frequently that he scarcely leaves the door, be assured that NBC is taking very special measure this time around.

Top NBC execs, many of whom are Illuminati free masons, have consulted with a special blue ribbon panel of mad scientists on the best way to deal with the ticklish late nite transition issue. After some serious thought execs have opted to freeze Leno in a giant cylinder of liquid nitrogen. They have tons of those things lying around the Thirty Mile Zone, after that brief craze for Celebrity Cryogenics dried up. So Jay can be kept in cold storage – just like Austin Powers in that movie! This way Leno’s mojo can be saved up in case NBC ever needs it again. They’ve been shy about making that mistake again ever since they let Bill Cosby go & couldn’t bring him back again. This way Leno’s mojo can be safely contained, lest it once again prove too dangerous, and escape from captivity!

Did The Illuminati Kill Jay Leno’s Career?

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