Robin Thicke Breaks His Post-Split Silence

Proud Papa Alan Thinke once described his son Robin and daughter in law Paula Patton as a super couple, however it seems that the dynamic duo have run into a rough patch, perhaps involving kryptonite
Robin Thicke breaks silence on Paula Patton split

Alan Thicke was once quoted as describing his son and daughter in law ,Paula Patton, as a super couple, and compared them to Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie. At least he didn’t compare them to Superman & Wonder Woman.  If you’ve followed entertainment gossip to any degree then you know that show business is rough on relationships, even for super couples. So it shouldn’t be too much of a surprise that the Thicke’s have split.

These things can come apart in any number of ways: people grow apart, the pressures of respective career demands pull people in separate directions, or maybe Robin caught the missus spiking his smoothies with kryptonite. That last one would’ve been unforgivable! However after his Miley Cyrus tweaking episode it would be understandable.

Anyway here’s a brief video update on the Thicke split.

Robin and Paula seem like an attractive and personable couple. So it’s a shame. However there is other shameful news to take our minds off of it. Like Paula Deen and Duck Dynasty. Paula was a marque personality on one of those lifestyle networks. She taught American how to make tasty food by soaking everything in lard and then deep frying it beyond recognition. The idea seemed to be “wrap it in bacon and they will come”. So naturally she gained a following.

She lost that following after some unkind remarks of her’s became public. Those ignorant comments don’t need to be repeated here, but suffice it to say thats she ain’t gonna be getting any Martin Luther King jr. awards. So then it was scandal time. Internet posters vented their rage and acted like they wanted to see Deen smothered in lard and lowered into a deep fat fryer! Whether or not that would help her achieve a state of crispy golden perfection, I doubt it would change her attitudes any.

Now Paula at least had the very good sense to drop out of the public eye for a while. When you really fuck up bad sometimes it’s a good idea to give everyone a chance to forget about whatever it was that you said or did that pissed them off so mightily. However the recent comments of Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson have drawn Deen out of hiding.

You’ll recall that Robertson was interviewed in GQ Magazine. That because when you run a style based publication you naturally want the input of a guy in a John Deere cap and camouflage over hauls. It just doesn’t make sense. Robertson then went on to share his views on homosexuality – he doesn’t get it and thinks it’s against the Bible. He then went on to make some ‘insensitive’ comments about the plight of black people in the south. They were along the “so what was the big problem with that” vein. Some thought that Robertson had become officially worse than Hitler. Other speculated that he was sick of DD, and would do or say anything to get himself fired. If that was the plan it didn’t work. DD is A&E’s biggest draw – so they really couldn’t afford to lose him as long as viewers keep tuning in. Maybe tea bagger Sarah Palin’s impulsive defense of him helped.

So Paula has taken some exception to this. Basically Deen wants to know why Big Phil and the Quack Pack are getting some kind of a free pass on this while she was drawn and quartered (her only defender was the Rev Jesse Jackson who was quoted as saying he didn’t see how destroying her would be of any help). While her chicken fried empire was in jeopardy, Duck Dynasty kept rolling on like it was water off of a quack’s back. Meanwhile America’s collective sholestrol  levels are dropping dramatically – so Deen still has a difference to make! Here’s a brief video on that.

The public feels that there are no place for Deen’s rather obnoxious views. However there might still be an important contribution for her to make. As you may be aware Israeli actress Gal Gadot has been cast in a three picture Wonder Woman deal. This makes her the 1st official Wonder Woman since Lynda Carter. Gal’s tall, beautiful, a former member of the Israeli army, & a former Miss Israel. Plus she did her own stunts in several Fast & Furious flicks. There’s just one slight glitch. Gadot is a size 0. So she’s got to gain some weight before she can don the satin tights.

To that end Gadot has been on a weight gain intensive to bulk up for the role. The studio’s have send their top trainer over the the Promised Land in order to work with Gadot personally. So she’s into a grueling regime of physical training and martial arts. Basically they’ve done everything short of shooting the girl full of horse estrogen. She’s also on a 3500 calorie a day diet to get some meat on them bones. Every fashion model’s dream.

This is where Deen could come in. No one knows more about hi calorie diets than Paula. So why not let her redeem herself by sending her over to work with Gadot? She could act as her personal chef, & whip up some heavily buttered, thickly battered, deep fried goodies that could have Gadot bursting at the seams in no time flat! I doubt that Deen cooks kosher – but when the world is waiting for Wonder Woman, & the magic that she does, exceptions have to be made. The only possible problem with this scenario could be the possible side effects: like Gadot developing type 2 diabetes, or her pancreas exploding. That’s always an issue with Deen’s cookin’. Still a few serving of refried caramelized lard combined with grueling work outs and Gadot could be sprouting bulging new curves in no time!

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Ted Nugent Offers Disingenuous "Apology" For Calling Obama A "Subhuman Mongrel"

Ted goes off half cocked, shoots from the lip

Ted Nugent is many things. He’s a genuinely talented musician. Although zany, he’s an articulate & outspoken advocate for the causes he supports. He’s an inflammatory media personality who can be counted on to say something outrageous. These days he’s also up to his neck in shit. That’s because while debating a cause he fervently believes in – the right to bear arms, he got carried away and called US President Barack Obama a ‘sub human mongrel’. That at about 2:50 on the above tape.

while talking to the good people at guns.com recently motor city mad man Ted Nugent got a little carried away while using his 1st ammendment rights to defend his 2nd ammendment rights. Then he called US President Barack Obama a really nasty name
America’s Crazy Uncle Ted

Now to understand a multi faceted personality like Ted Nugent you have to put him in context. Every other family in America has a “crazy uncle”. He’s usually your mom or dad’s youngest sib. His parents were too old and tired to deal with him so he grew up wild & doing pretty much whatever the fuck he wanted. He drops by your house unexpected, because your parents would never invite him. When he shows up he’s stinking of booze and weed. Some completely messed up girl who looks like a stripper is hanging on his arm. He invites himself in and spends the evening regaling everyone with tales of fucking and fighting. While the children gather around to listen eagerly, mom looks like she’s about to give birth to an ulcer. Dad just kind of stares blankly into space while nursing a strong drink. Occasionally dad nods and says something non committal like “uh huh”, or “hmmmm”. The theme of the evening is “let’s just get this over with”. If the scene were a painting it would be Norman Rockwell by Salvador Dali! Basically Nugent is America’s Crazy Uncle Ted & friendly bad influence.

So that brings us back to Ted and the shit he’s in. Ted was giving an interview to the good people over at guns.com. They have a lot in common, like their support of the second 2nd Amendment, and their liberal exercise of the 1st Amendment. That’s an admirable thing. More Americans should probably bother to acquaint themselves with the workings of their government, and involve themselves in it’s processes. That’s taking democracy back and making it work for the people – like it was intended to do (but if you put the foxes in charge of the hen house then what can you expect?). Problem is that Ted got carried away. Then he called the US Pres Barack Obama a real nasty name.

Now as you can imagine that hasn’t gone over very well. For one thing Ted is actively campaigning for Rick Perry‘s successor to the Texas governorship. I’m sure that the Republicans were glad to have him on board. It projects the right image – that conservative politics is as relevant to cool outlaw rock n rollers as it is to too big to fail wall street brokers. The common touch is where ever you find it! Of course now with Ted spouting racist type language of the kind that wouldn’t be welcome on Duck Dynasty, the right wing is distancing it’s self from Ted “Loose Cannon” Nugent. Like when Rick Perry showed up on CNN and admitted that he personally has a problem with anyone calling his president a ‘sub human mongrel’.

So where does that leave us. For one thing Ted probably ain’t getting invited out to any more political rallies. Professional politicians have enough trouble explaining their own gaffs without having to take responsibility for other peoples. It also leaves Ted backpedaling in the form of an apology. Apology is a fine thing, though some have described his as a bit ‘half hearted’. Since his original comments were a bit half cocked, maybe it evens out in sort of the same way that two wrongs make a right or something.

Then again lets hope that Crazy Uncle Ted is more responsible with his 2nd Amendment rights then he is in discharging his 1st Amendment rights. In the meantime Ted’s future forays into the public eye will probably be increasingly uninvited and unexpected. As entertaining as those might be, they might be a bit of a challenge to get through! Now here’s that apology!

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Rupert Sanders Still Wants Kristen Stewart

What’s new and interesting in the world of entertainment gossip? Well Rupert Saunders still wants Kristen Stewart! Well actually that’s more like old news with a new angle. If you’ll recall Kristen was the girl who played a vampire in a series of movies, and Rupert Saunders directed her in Snow White and the Huntsman, which was supposed to be her big A List springboard from the Twilight series. Things  took an unfortunate turn when Kristy and Rup were exposed as having an affair. That was bad since Kristen was in love with her on screen vampire boyfriend Robert Pattinson at the time, and the love affair was a selling angle for the flicks.

So fans had some sort of collective conniption. The phrase ‘trampire’ got coined on twitter, Kristy was even chased into her car by a pack of irate Twilight fans in one incident. Once she locked herself in they began rocking the car. It was very stressful! She was attacked persistently and mercilessly by Twihards who couldn’t believe that she’d thrown over a vampire for a middle aged married man!

Naturally that impacted her career. There were no more bog A List block busters for her to star in. Perhaps because the powers that be feared she no longer had a fan base to carry a film. There might even be some kind of Box Office Backlash! Even Pattinson’s career took a bit of a dive. So that lead to damage control with Kris and Rob showing up everywhere in public, talking marraige and even buying a house. I think that they had some kind of Adams Family type monstrosity picked out, somewhere in England. It was some gothy Victorian number with blood red walls, an on site cemetery, and something described as a ‘werewolf’ kennels. I think that the ‘werewolf kennels’ had originally been ‘centaur stables’ – the mid Victorians were an odd lot, but werewolves play better when you’re planning around fandom conventions. The movie going public didn’t buy the reunion act (those of us old enough to remember already had our hearts broken by Sonny & Cher. Can we be blamed for being too cynical to buy it?). So Rob & Kris were off the hook, or as far as the monster home goes.  Hope that they got their deposit back, but good luck tot he relators trying to unload that on anyone else.

Though Rob & Kris went their separate ways one person who remained hung up in the past was Rupert Saunders. At least according to HollyscoopTV . They claim that the director is still hung up on Stewart, and even “in love”. “In love” is a ludicrous phrase for a middle aged person to use, especially a few years after the incident. So it sounds bad. So how bad is bad? Have a look at Hollyscoop’s video on the subject and see for yourself!

Twilight was hard on everyone. Kinda like a stake through he heart. So thank God we had Kim Kardashian to get us through that difficult period. Kim made a sex tape which eventually got her on to reality TV! There she portrayed a kinder gentler Paris Hilton. People liked her and were interested in her family’s antics. So she did well.

Then she married Kris Humpheries. They made a killing out of selling the coverage of the marriage to TV, or to some magazine. Over $ 22 million by some accounts. Then after only 72 days and on Halloween Day, the couple split! Kim explained that she had followed her heart, and then followed it in a different direction. Fans said “like fuck” and start acting like it was some kind of rip off. People started calling her “Kar-trashian”, and it looked like her substantial business empire was in jeopardy.

Kim was more fortunate than Kristen Stewart, since she had Kanye West there to reform her. The pair got involved. Kim followed Kanye on tour at one point. Then they had a daughter – North West. That kid is probably gonna change her name sometime later in life. So everything is hunky dory. So much so that Kim actually has some kind of new baby product line out! Kim did not give away too many details, but she did say it will be
affordable and it’s been confirmed it will be released in March!

Kim & Kris are examples of celebrity that took a wrong turn somewhere, maybe around Albuquerque. Just like those Roswell aliens! Their promising images got tarnished somehow, perhaps by personal indiscretions. Another example would be Duck Dynasty. They got popular on reality TV by being rich and very redneck. They made their loot on duck lures and now people could watch how they lived in real life with cameras following them everywhere. The Robertson’s got about 7 season on A&E out of that!

Then patriarch Phil said some unsympathetic stuff about homosexuals, like “I don’t get it!”. and “It’s against the Bible”. He gave some interview to GQ which had people commenting about his rebellious and political views instead of asking ‘why is this guy even in GQ?’. That got him temporarily suspended from his popular duck show. It also caused a minor backlash amongst reactionaries, like Sarah Palin (who later admitted that she didn’t even know what he’d said when she took to defending him. Good ole Sarah!) who felt his freedom of speech was somehow being violated. That might not have been technically true since a violation of free speech is when they throw you in prison for speaking your beliefs, which no one did. In this case his employers merely questioned the wisdom of continuing to pay him, which is their right in a free market to do.

So the whole issue was rife with political technicalities like free speech vs free market. Reality TV and duck lures acan take you to strange places! Sarah Palin wasn’t the most reliable guide either. So maybe that’s why Willie Robertson has gotten political. He was out and about at some kind of GOP bash for the State of the Union address. He was in good company too, like Newt Gingrich. Sexy Sarah wasn’t in the picture. After watching the president lay it out there, and probably making some little cracks – you know how neocons can be, the whole crew then went out for eats & drinks.

That’s when Willie got everyone’s attention. Now he didn’t get sloshed and start making inflammatory comments. Far from it. He payed for everyone’s meal by picking up everyone’s tab! You know how those smug complacent Republicans can eat, and that’s saying nothing about knocking back the liquor! Then he made a really generous gesture – he tipped the waiter %100! Celebrity gone wrong is one thing, but tipping the staff is doing it right!

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