Gwyneth Paltrow cooks up a storm

Gwyneth Paltrow get’s an unexpected shock

Gwyneth Paltrow has a new cook book out and the inspiration was a stroke that later turned out to be merely a panic attack. She had just finished serving lunch in her spacious garden when, and to use her words “not to be overly dramatic“, she thought that she was gonna die. That’s because she came over light headed, lost the ability to form thoughts, and developed a searing headache. Now that happens to some of us several times daily, & sometimes they’re even called hangovers  However it can be a bit of a shock if you’re not used to it.

suddenly one sunny day

Anyway back to Gwyneth. Just because you don’t wanna be melodramatic is no reason not to blow something completely out of proportion. So Gwyneth decided that she was having some kind of near death experience, or in her own words – “One sunny afternoon in London, in the spring of 2011, I thought — without sounding overly dramatic — that I was going to die. I had just served lunch in the garden at home. I had a vague feeling that I was going to faint, and I wasn’t forming thoughts correctly. I got a searing pain in my head, I couldn’t speak, and I felt as if I couldn’t breathe. I thought I was having a stroke.

Gwyneth survives but doesn’t get over it

This tale does have a happy ending. Gwen goes to the doctor, who explains to her that she’s having a panic attack. This is something that sometimes happens to high strung, anxious people. They usually survive, even if they never actually get over it. There’s not much you can do about the condition, apart from tiresome self improvement seminars that encourage neurotic people to focus even more closely on themselves. Just stick to the basics: smoke plenty of good weed, get enough rest, have glass of wine with dinner, and watch what you eat. That gives yous something to do while nature sorts things out.

When life hands you a lemon make GOOP – because anyone can make lemonade!

The trouble with giving anxious or restless people something to do while time sorts things out is that sometimes they can get a little carried away. Not that I’m accusing Paltrow of making a religion out of her new experience and consequent insights. She hasn’t sashayed down off of the mountain top with the Gospel According to Gwyneth neatly engraved on twin elegantly mono graphed marble tablets or anything. She simply sat down and wrote a new cook book called It’s All Good. So give her credit for keeping it in proportion. However she did write her book GOOP style. That means getting a little carried away and going overboard.

Taking the starch out of Gwyneth Paltrow

In this case GOOP means that Gwyneth gets kind of particular and hyper finicky. For instance she’s got a long list of don’t. She brags that you won’t find a slice of bread or a chicken egg any where in her house. It ain’t because she and hubby Chris Martin are hard up or anything either. Bread is full of gluten. As Gwyneth has discovered gluten can do a real number on your metabolism & nervous system. Since Gwyneth’s nervous system is on over drive most days it doesn’t need any help in that department. Plus she also discovered that Chris and the kids are gluten intolerant too.So the residence is now a starch free zone.

So when you rule out everything else, that leaves you with food for thought?

health conscious types fear gluten

Paltrow backs up her health regime too. Says Gwyn “Every single nutritionist, doctor and health-conscious person I have ever come across . . . seems to concur that (gluten) is tough on the system and many of us are at best intolerant of it and at worst allergic to it. Sometimes when my family is not eating pasta, bread or processed grains like white rice, we’re left with that specific hunger that comes with avoiding carbs.” Sounds like bad news. On the bright side if she’d been Al Gore and those nutritionists, doctors, and other assorted health conscious people (like other students in Paltrow’s yoga classes) who seemed to concur had been eco scientists, then this thing would be An Inconvenient Truth. So be thankful that it’s merely a cook book that strongly discourages pasta, bread, rice, sugar, dairy & chicken eggs among other things, and not some agenda for rearranging the world.

Remember to keep checking in @ Wondertrash, where you always know what’s cookin’, ’cause the menu is disturbingly familiar!

Hassel-back

A few days ago it was unofficially announced that Elizabeth Hasselbeck was allegedly leaving the View after about 17 years on the job. Liz joined about a year after the View started up. She came in straight out of Survivor to replace Lisa Ling. Nothing was official but the rumour was that the marketing guys figured that Liz was too unpopular. Her right wing politics was alienating large portions of the audience. So it was tie for her to go and explore other possibilities like possibly talk radio.

Well an official announcement has come down from on high by Barbara Walters herself, in addition to View spokesperson. The official word is that Liz is a valued member of the team, and that she has along term contract. in other words Hasselbeck ain’t going anywhere. Which only goes to show that you have to be careful about what you read on these gossip web sites.

Perhaps View producers have been reading some of the Internet messages posted about Hasselbeck, which indicate that she was more popular and well liked than believed. Also posters found her right wing views less objectionable than people with in the entertainment industry bubble believed. The general consensus being that she brought some semblance of balance to a stacked deck. Not that anyone would accuse the View of any kind of political bias. It’s just that Hasselbeck was probably the only person her co hosts knew of, besides Angie Harmon, who was voting for Mitt Romney. Let’s just say that sometimes the View is more of an echo chamber. Alternative opinions are essential to maintaining credibility, unless you’re preaching to the choir. Then credibility ain’t as important as consensus. Can we at least agree on that?

So things at the View are pretty much as they were, except for Joy Behar. That leaves Television Without Pity to sum the situation up with their online poll – who should have left the View with Joy Behar. There was one overwhelming favorite that won by a healthy 50% and it wasn’t Hasselbeck either. Just take a look at those current results posted below!

Elizabeth did come in second with a respectable 31 percent, right ahead of all of the above.However apathy was the clear winner! The poll is still on going so you to have a chance to register your indifference by heading over to TWP. BTW as far as I know Brooke Shields is still on – unless they’ve bagged Sarah Palin. That broad is ratings dynamite!

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