Green Day Basket Case Goes to Rehab

Does anyone really care about the Emmy Awards? I’ll give you a brief recap – some people turned up in pretty dresses to collect some shiny chrome statutes for stuff that they think is of earth shattering importance even though no one will remember what they won their awards for. That’s not the point – the point is that they got to feel more important by being Kings & Queens for a day, if only for the evening. The rest is detail!

Who is interesting is Billie Joe Armstrong. He’s the leader of Green Day and has been around since fucking nineteen eighty fucking eight! He & Green Day recently played at IHeartRadio where he got kicked off stage for being less relevant than Justin Bieber. That provoked an onstage meltdown where he swore like it was an episode of the Trailer Park Boys while struggling for ten minutes to break his guitar. He was just as fuckin‘ tacky as fuck if you get what the fuck I’m fuckin’ sayin’.

Anyway today the other shoe has dropped. TMZ, the Internet leaders in trashy gossip, except for possibly Radaronline, have announced that Armstrong has entered into rehab for undisclosed issues that may or may not be related to his recent outburst of shit fuckery. Says a Green Day spokesperson – “Green day wants to apologize to those they offended at the iHeartRadio Festival in Las Vegas.” The rep adds, “The band regretfully must postpone some of their upcoming promotional appearances.“ Maybe when he gets his shit halfway together he & Fiona Apple can join forces for a Little Green Apple tour – and unleash  ‘rehab be damned’ sort of fuckery on the world?

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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