Rupert Sanders Still Wants Kristen Stewart

What’s new and interesting in the world of entertainment gossip? Well Rupert Saunders still wants Kristen Stewart! Well actually that’s more like old news with a new angle. If you’ll recall Kristen was the girl who played a vampire in a series of movies, and Rupert Saunders directed her in Snow White and the Huntsman, which was supposed to be her big A List springboard from the Twilight series. Things  took an unfortunate turn when Kristy and Rup were exposed as having an affair. That was bad since Kristen was in love with her on screen vampire boyfriend Robert Pattinson at the time, and the love affair was a selling angle for the flicks.

So fans had some sort of collective conniption. The phrase ‘trampire’ got coined on twitter, Kristy was even chased into her car by a pack of irate Twilight fans in one incident. Once she locked herself in they began rocking the car. It was very stressful! She was attacked persistently and mercilessly by Twihards who couldn’t believe that she’d thrown over a vampire for a middle aged married man!

Naturally that impacted her career. There were no more bog A List block busters for her to star in. Perhaps because the powers that be feared she no longer had a fan base to carry a film. There might even be some kind of Box Office Backlash! Even Pattinson’s career took a bit of a dive. So that lead to damage control with Kris and Rob showing up everywhere in public, talking marraige and even buying a house. I think that they had some kind of Adams Family type monstrosity picked out, somewhere in England. It was some gothy Victorian number with blood red walls, an on site cemetery, and something described as a ‘werewolf’ kennels. I think that the ‘werewolf kennels’ had originally been ‘centaur stables’ – the mid Victorians were an odd lot, but werewolves play better when you’re planning around fandom conventions. The movie going public didn’t buy the reunion act (those of us old enough to remember already had our hearts broken by Sonny & Cher. Can we be blamed for being too cynical to buy it?). So Rob & Kris were off the hook, or as far as the monster home goes.  Hope that they got their deposit back, but good luck tot he relators trying to unload that on anyone else.

Though Rob & Kris went their separate ways one person who remained hung up in the past was Rupert Saunders. At least according to HollyscoopTV . They claim that the director is still hung up on Stewart, and even “in love”. “In love” is a ludicrous phrase for a middle aged person to use, especially a few years after the incident. So it sounds bad. So how bad is bad? Have a look at Hollyscoop’s video on the subject and see for yourself!

Twilight was hard on everyone. Kinda like a stake through he heart. So thank God we had Kim Kardashian to get us through that difficult period. Kim made a sex tape which eventually got her on to reality TV! There she portrayed a kinder gentler Paris Hilton. People liked her and were interested in her family’s antics. So she did well.

Then she married Kris Humpheries. They made a killing out of selling the coverage of the marriage to TV, or to some magazine. Over $ 22 million by some accounts. Then after only 72 days and on Halloween Day, the couple split! Kim explained that she had followed her heart, and then followed it in a different direction. Fans said “like fuck” and start acting like it was some kind of rip off. People started calling her “Kar-trashian”, and it looked like her substantial business empire was in jeopardy.

Kim was more fortunate than Kristen Stewart, since she had Kanye West there to reform her. The pair got involved. Kim followed Kanye on tour at one point. Then they had a daughter – North West. That kid is probably gonna change her name sometime later in life. So everything is hunky dory. So much so that Kim actually has some kind of new baby product line out! Kim did not give away too many details, but she did say it will be
affordable and it’s been confirmed it will be released in March!

Kim & Kris are examples of celebrity that took a wrong turn somewhere, maybe around Albuquerque. Just like those Roswell aliens! Their promising images got tarnished somehow, perhaps by personal indiscretions. Another example would be Duck Dynasty. They got popular on reality TV by being rich and very redneck. They made their loot on duck lures and now people could watch how they lived in real life with cameras following them everywhere. The Robertson’s got about 7 season on A&E out of that!

Then patriarch Phil said some unsympathetic stuff about homosexuals, like “I don’t get it!”. and “It’s against the Bible”. He gave some interview to GQ which had people commenting about his rebellious and political views instead of asking ‘why is this guy even in GQ?’. That got him temporarily suspended from his popular duck show. It also caused a minor backlash amongst reactionaries, like Sarah Palin (who later admitted that she didn’t even know what he’d said when she took to defending him. Good ole Sarah!) who felt his freedom of speech was somehow being violated. That might not have been technically true since a violation of free speech is when they throw you in prison for speaking your beliefs, which no one did. In this case his employers merely questioned the wisdom of continuing to pay him, which is their right in a free market to do.

So the whole issue was rife with political technicalities like free speech vs free market. Reality TV and duck lures acan take you to strange places! Sarah Palin wasn’t the most reliable guide either. So maybe that’s why Willie Robertson has gotten political. He was out and about at some kind of GOP bash for the State of the Union address. He was in good company too, like Newt Gingrich. Sexy Sarah wasn’t in the picture. After watching the president lay it out there, and probably making some little cracks – you know how neocons can be, the whole crew then went out for eats & drinks.

That’s when Willie got everyone’s attention. Now he didn’t get sloshed and start making inflammatory comments. Far from it. He payed for everyone’s meal by picking up everyone’s tab! You know how those smug complacent Republicans can eat, and that’s saying nothing about knocking back the liquor! Then he made a really generous gesture – he tipped the waiter %100! Celebrity gone wrong is one thing, but tipping the staff is doing it right!

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Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Back On: Hold Hands At AMA’s

& Now something to balance out the Chris & Rihanna reunion!

There’s very good news for all you Bieber believers out there. The news seemed pretty bleak for a while. That’s because Justin Bieber and his pretty girl friend Selena Gomez were on the outs. Selena’s people issued some kind of a press release saying that the junior power couple were splitzville cause Selena was having some trust issues with the Bieb. That was bad timing because The Bieber had just giving a big interview in which he proclaimed his love for Gomez and talked about how proud he was to take thing public with her. The bust up announcement came before the interview got aired so it made things look kind of bad for Bieber.

However true love has prevailed – just like in the Twilight universe, with this recent announcement that Justin and Selena are back on again. Just watch this short video from TMZ for confirmation, and then relax and settle back into a feeling of well being that comes from knowing the universe is in harmony!

Although those little rascals did have me worried for awhile!

Justin TV

Justin and Selena’s teeny bopper break up had to be the biggest news since Kristen Stewart turned trampire and cheated on poor Robert Pattinson, or since Wonder Woman kissed Superman. Wonder Woman swears on her Amazonite bracelets that he kissed her, & that kissing a man “wasn’t that bad” – “I just closed my eyes and imagined Katy Perry!“. Official word from the Man of Steel‘s people is that Diana was on him like a dog on a fire hydrant the minute his guard was down, and it was as much as he could do to eventually restrain her! In fact sources close to the MoS claim he says that for a while it was like Wonderlips thought that she was a Baywatch lifeguard taping a rescue scene with poor hapless Supes as a drowning victim to be mouth massaged back to life. AS for Justin & Selena you can read the score card of their bust ups and reunions over @ EOnLine! It’s compelling reading that you just can’t miss!

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Rob Pattinson Dating Sienna Miller’s Sister, Savannah

Despite reports that Robert Pattinson is back with Kristen Stewart, a new report suggest that he’s dating a mystery girl. Rob was spotted at Electric room in NYC with his new girl which is rumored to be Sienna Miller‘s sister.

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Robert Pattinson makes new friends

Robert Pattinson has been making new friends ever since Kristen Stewart shocked the world & the Twilight Fandom Netherverse by cheating on him with her Snow White director Rupert Saunders. You’ll recall that Kristy was photoed making out with Saunders and then had to do a public mea culpe. Fans were more furious than democrats following the last presidential debate. It looked like Spiltsville with an option on heartbreak hotel as the U Haul lugged Stewart’s shit out of Pattinson’s home, and Stewie took his dog Bear hostage.

Stewie & Patzy patched it up, in time for the Twilight Breaking Up Part 2 promotional tour. So that had the fanverse split. Half figured that this was some PR spin move for the sake of the movie, and protecting Kristen Stewart’s fan base – an important movie industry asset. The other half wonder when Pattinson was gonna buy the ring and the pair would start popping out their brood of dark spawn. The latter were the ones who never stopped believing in Santa Claus, they just thought he grew fangs as they got older.

Rob, 26, was seen at New York City’s Electric Room with the sexy unidentified blonde at 3 a.m. on October 6. His arm was draped around her, and it totally looked like he was getting flirty!

Well it looks like the other shoe has finally dropped. Patzy was spotted out and about recently. He was busy nuzzling up with some mystery girl too. From the fuzzy pictures that are making the rounds we can’t actually be sure of who he’s with – maybe it’s not really a chick. One thing we can be relatively sure about is that it ain’t the love of his life, Vampira. This one’s a blondie.

Now steady on Twilight fans cause this might not be what it seems. Perhaps Patzy got a little peckish and was drawing some blood from a victim’s neck!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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Kristen Stewart Ditches Robert Pattinson For Daddy-Daughter Florence & T…

Kristen Stewart Ditches Robert Pattinson For Daddy-Daughter get together

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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Rod Serling – American Masters – PBS – Documentary

The heady world of Hollywood seems a little like a Twilight Zone – what with those sad faces and painted on magazine smiles. Behind the plastic surgery and designer duds hides some very funky stuff indeed. Maybe that’s why one of the entertainment industry‘s most successful products has been the Twilight Zone. Long before Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson were riding the Twilight franchise train, a writer named Rod Sterling made twilight a household word. Here’s a little glimpse into the world of Rod Sterling.

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Robert Pattinson Gives Kristen Stewart Wedding Ultimatum

Who’s sorry now?

Sounds like Patzy has popped the question with intent to tie the knot. This is a real good deal for Patzy cause Stewie‘s career has been more promising than his right up until she got carried away playing Snow White and the public turned on her. So if he takes her back people will forgive her – cause after all if Patz has why wouldn’t you? Then she can go on making movies and Patzy can be Mr. Kristen Stewart. The best part is that he’s got her over a barrel. She can’t say no now after betraying him, and the whole Twilight Netherverse with her wanton ways. If she’s serious with all those “I’m sorry’s” and “The most important person in the world” not to mention wearing his old shirts in public, she pretty much has to follow through cause she’s backed into a corner!

Hope Tom Cruise is taken’ note, cause this is how you handle a woman!

Oh the hi price of redemption. Let’s see Stewie squirm outta this one!

 They’re like superheroes, except they’re incredibly normal!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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Twilight – at least it’s not Love Story

Twilight fans – please, & in the words of Capt James T Kirk, commander of the USS Enterprise – “Get a Life!”

People come on – this is only a teen vampire movie. It’s not like this is Star Trek or anything!

Now that Pattinstew are unofficially officially back together after unofficially officially splitting people are asking “WTF?” Well Kristen cheated or something and broke the hearts of Twilight fans everywhere. She did that by cheating on the love of her life with her Snow White boss. Twihards’ hysterical reactions made the whole film franchise suddenly look silly.Like beyond Star Trek Convention silly!  That left Kristen wandering around in Rob’s old shirts and dragging Rob’s pet dog Bear by the leash as she cast her eyes about forlornly trying to see which direction her career left in, or which direction an attack of Twihards might come from. Meanwhile the final flick in the series was getting released. So clearly something had to be done!

Krissy & Robsy up in a tree

“Are we back on?” she asks

& he says “we’ll see”

Whether or not something was does something happened, or seemed to. Robsy and Krissy are back together, sort of. Apparently it’s at some tentative reconciliation phase yet where they’re living together but on a “we’ll see” basis. So Twihards can heavy a giant sigh of relief, & Krissy Stew is more or  less off the hook. Now that was a close one for her cause she was catchin’ backlash – though it’s not like she violated the Prime Directive or anything. That still leaves the general question of “WTF?” open. It’s best not to question the phenomenon that is Pattinstew too closely, because like any gothic soap opera, Twilight is full of shadows & misunderstandings – as the following short and entertaining clip will demonstrate!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Back Together?

That fork in the road was almost a stake through the heart!

lovey dovey dopey

They’re back! So that should come as a relief to the millions of Twilight fans who seemed to be on the edge of some kind of collective nervous breakdown. It was rough there for a while with Kristen Stewart wearing Rob Pattinson‘s old clothes and Rob running off to hide out with Reese Witherspoon. The news that Kristy was cheatin’ with Rupert Saunders – her Snow White director – can as something of a shocker to Rob, and to the whole Twilight Netherverse!

girls just wanna have fun

There was major blow back too. Kristy got herself some major slut shaming for people who thought the idea of a 22 year old having a fling was history’s greatest tragedy. You’d think that she’d violated Sharia law by baring her ankle or something, the way twitter went into overload. Kristers was even chased down in the street, according to one report carried in the National Enquirer. She hide out in her car as a couple of young women menaced her from out side. It was a bad experience that caused her to hire a body guard.

stoned & sorry

Anyway the whole thing went onto shit overload. Kristy seemed concerned about her career future. Now you gotta understand that this is a girl who loves the whole process of acting so much that she forgets to pee – unless that’s a marijuana side effect. Kristy “allegedly” enjoys nature’s finest – so don’t go calling her Lucy Stoner cause you read something here. Anyway the idea that the fandom that supported her career might turn on her must’ve been a little unnerving. So there was plenty of incentive for sorry.

abandoned & betrayed

So it was a fascinating situation involving two otherwise low key people (when once asked what he did for excitement Pattinson replied that he liked hanging out in hotel rooms alone and getting drunk. He then went on to explain that he’s shy.). At the break of the fuss Pattinson even claimed he wanted a face to face show down with Rupert Saunders, the many who tarnished his dark gothy love. It wasn’t revealed whether Rob was gonna sort Ropert out, or maybe ask for work or something. Then the reports came about Kristy approaching a the emotional breaking point and Rob feeling lonely and betrayed. That was while the rest of the world was contemplating their career futures.

dark shadows & silver linings

So naturally the pair eventually patched it up. Who know’s why. Cynics say that this is just part of a PR stunt. Valuable studio assets need protecting. They’ll be lovey dovey for awhile. Then Pattinson will cheat. He’ll be justified cause of what Kristy did, but she’ll be off the hook too cause he paid her back. That balancing the PR books & people can go back to liking them on a “Team RPatz” & “Team KStew” basis. Meanwhile it’s reassuring to know that if the Twilight series isn’t getting anymore sequels, then at least Pattinstew is!

pathetic single men

Then there’s the possiblity that Rob forgave her so he can get some of his stuff back. In addition to some of his old dirty T Shirts it seems that when Kristy got kicked out she also took Patz’ dog Bear with her. Then there’s the possibly that Rob feared growing old single and alone in Hollywood without his one true love beside him. You know how single men can sometimes get stigmatized, like George Clooney. Who’d wanna be George Clooney? So something had to be done! That means taking back the girl who helped him become the vampire heart throb he is today! It was either that or Dancing With The Stars. Look at it this way, there’s a good woman behind every successful man so Stewie must have something going for her. if she’s occasionally a little hot to trot, mark it down to her being born in the Chinese Year of the Horse! Next time Rob, keep a firm hand on the reins!

For more on Stigmatized single men here’s The Young Turks!

If your’re in this predicament remember that it pays to have some good excuses lined up. Not the old “never met the right girl” line. Men aren’t that picky, so people will wonder what’s up. Try something more plausible and  believable like “I’ve taken a religious vow”, “New World Order nanobot technology rendered me sterile”, or even “old sports injury”. That ought’a hold ’em!

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