Rupert Sanders Still Wants Kristen Stewart

What’s new and interesting in the world of entertainment gossip? Well Rupert Saunders still wants Kristen Stewart! Well actually that’s more like old news with a new angle. If you’ll recall Kristen was the girl who played a vampire in a series of movies, and Rupert Saunders directed her in Snow White and the Huntsman, which was supposed to be her big A List springboard from the Twilight series. Things  took an unfortunate turn when Kristy and Rup were exposed as having an affair. That was bad since Kristen was in love with her on screen vampire boyfriend Robert Pattinson at the time, and the love affair was a selling angle for the flicks.

So fans had some sort of collective conniption. The phrase ‘trampire’ got coined on twitter, Kristy was even chased into her car by a pack of irate Twilight fans in one incident. Once she locked herself in they began rocking the car. It was very stressful! She was attacked persistently and mercilessly by Twihards who couldn’t believe that she’d thrown over a vampire for a middle aged married man!

Naturally that impacted her career. There were no more bog A List block busters for her to star in. Perhaps because the powers that be feared she no longer had a fan base to carry a film. There might even be some kind of Box Office Backlash! Even Pattinson’s career took a bit of a dive. So that lead to damage control with Kris and Rob showing up everywhere in public, talking marraige and even buying a house. I think that they had some kind of Adams Family type monstrosity picked out, somewhere in England. It was some gothy Victorian number with blood red walls, an on site cemetery, and something described as a ‘werewolf’ kennels. I think that the ‘werewolf kennels’ had originally been ‘centaur stables’ – the mid Victorians were an odd lot, but werewolves play better when you’re planning around fandom conventions. The movie going public didn’t buy the reunion act (those of us old enough to remember already had our hearts broken by Sonny & Cher. Can we be blamed for being too cynical to buy it?). So Rob & Kris were off the hook, or as far as the monster home goes.  Hope that they got their deposit back, but good luck tot he relators trying to unload that on anyone else.

Though Rob & Kris went their separate ways one person who remained hung up in the past was Rupert Saunders. At least according to HollyscoopTV . They claim that the director is still hung up on Stewart, and even “in love”. “In love” is a ludicrous phrase for a middle aged person to use, especially a few years after the incident. So it sounds bad. So how bad is bad? Have a look at Hollyscoop’s video on the subject and see for yourself!

Twilight was hard on everyone. Kinda like a stake through he heart. So thank God we had Kim Kardashian to get us through that difficult period. Kim made a sex tape which eventually got her on to reality TV! There she portrayed a kinder gentler Paris Hilton. People liked her and were interested in her family’s antics. So she did well.

Then she married Kris Humpheries. They made a killing out of selling the coverage of the marriage to TV, or to some magazine. Over $ 22 million by some accounts. Then after only 72 days and on Halloween Day, the couple split! Kim explained that she had followed her heart, and then followed it in a different direction. Fans said “like fuck” and start acting like it was some kind of rip off. People started calling her “Kar-trashian”, and it looked like her substantial business empire was in jeopardy.

Kim was more fortunate than Kristen Stewart, since she had Kanye West there to reform her. The pair got involved. Kim followed Kanye on tour at one point. Then they had a daughter – North West. That kid is probably gonna change her name sometime later in life. So everything is hunky dory. So much so that Kim actually has some kind of new baby product line out! Kim did not give away too many details, but she did say it will be
affordable and it’s been confirmed it will be released in March!

Kim & Kris are examples of celebrity that took a wrong turn somewhere, maybe around Albuquerque. Just like those Roswell aliens! Their promising images got tarnished somehow, perhaps by personal indiscretions. Another example would be Duck Dynasty. They got popular on reality TV by being rich and very redneck. They made their loot on duck lures and now people could watch how they lived in real life with cameras following them everywhere. The Robertson’s got about 7 season on A&E out of that!

Then patriarch Phil said some unsympathetic stuff about homosexuals, like “I don’t get it!”. and “It’s against the Bible”. He gave some interview to GQ which had people commenting about his rebellious and political views instead of asking ‘why is this guy even in GQ?’. That got him temporarily suspended from his popular duck show. It also caused a minor backlash amongst reactionaries, like Sarah Palin (who later admitted that she didn’t even know what he’d said when she took to defending him. Good ole Sarah!) who felt his freedom of speech was somehow being violated. That might not have been technically true since a violation of free speech is when they throw you in prison for speaking your beliefs, which no one did. In this case his employers merely questioned the wisdom of continuing to pay him, which is their right in a free market to do.

So the whole issue was rife with political technicalities like free speech vs free market. Reality TV and duck lures acan take you to strange places! Sarah Palin wasn’t the most reliable guide either. So maybe that’s why Willie Robertson has gotten political. He was out and about at some kind of GOP bash for the State of the Union address. He was in good company too, like Newt Gingrich. Sexy Sarah wasn’t in the picture. After watching the president lay it out there, and probably making some little cracks – you know how neocons can be, the whole crew then went out for eats & drinks.

That’s when Willie got everyone’s attention. Now he didn’t get sloshed and start making inflammatory comments. Far from it. He payed for everyone’s meal by picking up everyone’s tab! You know how those smug complacent Republicans can eat, and that’s saying nothing about knocking back the liquor! Then he made a really generous gesture – he tipped the waiter %100! Celebrity gone wrong is one thing, but tipping the staff is doing it right!

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Love, & Politics, America Style!

Sarah Palin is flirting again, and with more than the presidency. Wondertrash has previously posted about how Sarah has invested in a swanky spread down in Arizona (almost $2 million worth of swank!), and left husband Todd north in Alaska. They are hammering out a top secret divorce deal, but that isn’t gonna be finalized until after the 2012 election. Sarah wants to keep everything as traditional as possible for the campaign, which means that Todd’s has to appear at her side.

if you can’t get God on your side, then settle for Billy Graham!

franklin graham and sarah palin getting it onMeanwhile Alaska Annie is getting friendly with a traditional sort of guy. For one thing he’s a kind of preacher. For another he’s a family man, complete with a wife. Now you can’t get more traditional than that, when it come’s to adultery anyway. You’ve probably even heard of the guy. He’s got a familiar name. The name is Franklin Graham and it sounds familiar because his dad is Confidante to Presidents Billy Graham! Billy is so close to the tops that when George W wanted to learn how to do the Christian thing, Billy went up to Camp David for 3 days to give him the Bible 101 introductory course!

prayer breakfasts & just desserts

We don’t know exactly when Sarah met Frankie, but she did come to his defense over some National Prayer Breakfast thing in in Wash DC, back in 2010. Frankie was banned from giving his usual address because he’d called Islam a hateful and violent religion. Actually he called it “very evil & wicked”. It’s important to be specific about that since most religions have their violent streak. Personally I thought adding the “very” was a bit too much, especially when talking about the beliefs of others.

half baked Alaskan

Some general or other thought this was inflammatory, and maybe even provocative. So Frankie got banned. Sarah spoke up and demanded he be allowed to attend and give his talk. I guess she figured that it was no worse than posting pix of politicos on your website, framed with bull’s eyes, who later get shot by unstable types – Gabrielle Giffords. You have to cut some slack in the Age of the Internet. At least we haven’t seen Sarah’s mature treasures exposed on Twitter, yet.

Tea Bag Air

Well anyway the pair really seemed to hit it off. They’ve even taken some romantic overseas trips together. this was facilitated by Franklin’s use of a corporate jet at his disposal. Franklin is a big deal in some thing called The Samaritan’s Purse. That an org set up by his father to disperse money around to worthy causes, like buying $38.3 million dollar airplanes to shuttle former Alaskan governors around in. When you’re fighting the good fight you can’t get hung up on details! They’ve gone to Haiti together, and Frankie has even lend Sarah the use of the jet for some of her Tea Bag Tours. Specifically he had the Samaritan’s Purse flight crew shuttle her from Roanoke Va to Montreat NC, for a book signing!

hanky panky

Now anyone might lend their $40 mill jet to an attractive woman in need, especially if she’s late for a book signing. How doe this prove that there’s hanky panky going on? Well the talk is getting kind of personal. An unnamed source – and don’t knock em cause they were right about John Edwards! – says that Frankie is constantly going on and on about what an amazing women the former Alaskan Governor is. He’s even describes her as beautiful, charismatic, and incredible. To hear him talk you’d think she had bullet proof bracelets or something! The source then goes onto say that this is odd because Franklin never talks about his lawfully wedded wife Jane! That’s born out by the Samaritan’s Purse website which has 15 mentions of Sarah, but not one – as of the Glove article’s publication – of Franklin’s long suffering wife. I’m guessing that Janie doesn’t get much use of the jet either!

North to Alaska

Now if this wasn’t bad enough the plot thickens. Frankie is buying a second home. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you’re a well heeled Evangelical with $40 mill of good will money to drop on jet planes, rather than out of them and onto the poor, then you’ve probably got enough spare loot for an extra house or to. The problem with this house is the problem with most business – location, location, location. This location is gonna be in Port Alsworth in where else? – the great state of Alaska. In fact Frankie is planning to ride his motor bike up there this summer! Maybe he thinks that will make some kind of macho impression, though it seems way too high school! I guess when you’re a preacher’s kid you’ve got something to live down; though this seems more like a stunt that would impress Bristol than a mature and sophisticated woman of the world planning to run for high office!

said it on the grapevine

Naturally this has people talking. So far, besides unnamed tabloid sources, they’re Internet bloggers. Some of them are saying things like “those two are joined at the hip“. Others are saying that they’d bet any money that the pair are ‘getting it on‘. If they’re as poor off as the average blogger then it’s a safe bet – even if they’re wrong you’d never collect based on the blood from a turnip principle.

Now no one listens to Internet bloggers – a fact of which I’m personally aware. However Sarah is an attractive woman allegedly at loose ends. So stuff can happen, especially if desperate Housewives is any indication. Plus with the well known antics of those rowdy Palin daughters there just might be a wayward streak in the family. The point is that if Sarah doesn’t watch her step then she might get shit on her pretty little moccasins. It wouldn’t be the first time that some one who was supposed to know better got the pubes caught in the barbed wire of bad press; Tony Weiner, Arnie Schwarzenegger, Elliot Spitzer, Gary Hart, Bull Clinton, the list goes on. It’s too soon to say whether Sarah’s gonna get herself onto that list; but if we know anything about her it’s that the wacky broad is a magnet for kooky publicity! So let’s call this a developing story. Let’s just hope that their sneaking around turns out to be more interesting than Daniel Craig & Rachel Weisz.


Dirty Sexy Politics

innocent gossip

Many people say “celebrity gossip” with a smirk and a role of the eyes. It’s as if they think there were more serious things to talk about. Things like politics, for instance. Now the more frivolous minded among us, like myself, hear “politics” and think “oh right, go on and be a pain in the ass if you want to and see if I care“. While they prattle on about amendment whatever I’ll be over in the tabloid section of the newsstand reading about OJ Simpson’s love child with Lindsay Lohan (BTW Lindsay has failed her most recent drug test taken during her house arrest. She tested positive for alcohol. I like the way she stays positive even during continued adversity. Hang in there kid!).

tabloid memories

If you’ve been hanging around the shit rags in an attempt to avoid hard news then you’ve probably noticed something disturbing: the encroachment of politics into the wold of celebrity gossip. Once upon a time you were safe between the pages of a super market tabloid. There, among Bigfoot, UFO’s, and Doris Day’s Hollywood memories you didn’t have to worry about to much reality. It was good campy fun with a sly measure of social satire.

politics sleazes up a good thing again

Suddenly and insidiously stories about high powered politicos started creeping in. Suddenly you couldn’t avoid reading about Arnold Schwarzenegger’s numerous love brood in an article featured near a picture of Anthony Weiner in women’s underwear. Desperate and betrayed Washington housewives gazed out weepily from among the gossip articles as if competing for space with Charlie Tiger Blood Sheen. Would Maria Schiver and Huma Abedin seek closure together on Oprah? Oprah might be working on it!

scandal is where politics meets gossip!

So when did politics become as much fun as show business? Certainly the whole John Edwards fiasco helped it along. When it gave the National Enquirer a credibility boost by putting them in the running for a Pulitzer Prize it was just the sort of encouragement the gutter media needed! It goes back farther than that though. Maybe it started back when Ronnie Reagan became the first B Actor to really play President on TV. Though it seemed like a lame idea at the time it worked out so well for the republican servants of evil (if you don’t know about the Republican Party’s link to Satanism & the occult then you really ought to check out our sister blog Area 51. Let’s just say that the back room boys like to worship a demon called Mollech down at Bohemian Grove.) the politics as show bis began to catch on in a way it hadn’t since Kennedy turned the 1960 presidential debate into some kind of a beauty pageant. Everyone knew that Richard Nixon just didn’t have a chance when it came to the swim suit competition, and had probably already blown it by the evening gown section.

Sarah Palin- Ronald Reagan in lipstick?

Anyway the upshot is that in the age of reality TV – which makes some nostalgic for the good old days of infotainment – celebrity politics has caught on with a vengeance. No one seems more poised to be come Ronald Reagan in lipstick than Sarah Palin! With her I Love Lucy sex appeal and her zany sit com antics she’s taken America by storm. Though she burst onto the scene as John McCain’s running mate, people seemed to be more interested in her colorful personal life than any policies she might have. People wanted to know about her children’s bizarre names, or about the time she was a beauty queen. When she feuded with David Letterman it was news and when she finally had her daytime summit with Oprah Winfrey it was an event. Then there was her teen age daughter Bristol.

Bristol Palin: Abstinence is great as long as it doesn’t interfere with your sex life!

Now at first glance it seems that there would be a lot more interesting folk about than Bristol the Pistol. She was a kind of average looking high school student. She didn’t seem to have many serious political views other than a support of abstinence in theory if not in practice. She was more likely to be behind the bleachers than at a protest. Her big claim to fame, besides her mother, was that she’s gotten knocked up. So that made her a celebrity in her own right. She did Dancing With The Stars, & she has a biography out Not Afraid of Life: My Journey So Far (if Britney then why not Bristol). By the title I assume that it’s one of those inspirational bios like Denise Richards has just penned. She probably stole it from the song title of some American Idol competitor. When did being full of shit become with it?

not so far – rites of pissage

Bristol’s journey so far ain’t slowing down either. The young lady has just marked another important rite of passage; like getting knocked up in high school and doing reality TV. She’s had her first hi profile public catfight – feud. Bristol has made some unflattering remarks about Meghan McCain. Meghan is the daughter of John McCain, who was Sarah’s running mate and nominal mentor before she went rogue.

Sarah plain and all

Now if you’ll recall those heady days of the last presidential election – John picked out Sarah as his vice presidential candidate after a 2 hour search on Google because after 6 years in a Vietnamese POW camp he apparently didn’t want to be president and thought that Sarah Palin was just the dingbat to blow the election for him. John had been trying to dodge the bullet of big ideas, usually imposed on him by his family, since his days in naval academy. Back then he tried to get out of things by crashing jets, they way John F Kennedy used to through dangerous sex with “strange pieces of ass“. Since his dad was some kind of an admiral or something calls got made and strings got pulled. John graduated naval academy in spite of himself and his best efforts. After that it was on down his life path like grain through a goose’s gullet. To whom much is given much is asked and all that – Oh how the other half lives. Anyway it wasn’t until Sarah came into his life that he successfully dodged the call to glory. It takes a woman’s touch and as far as that goes Ms. Palin is a real winner!

maverick or rogue – the old grey mare is the same old nag

So McCain and Palin had to be friends now for awhile, since the were running for public office together. It’s kind of like dance partners on DWTS – “we might start screwing each other in real life” McCain intro’d his new dance partner as a “maverick”. I don’t know whether that means Sarah is accustomed to wearing a saddle and bridle bit, but the idea seemed to catch on in an irritating sort of way. It also required the McCains to make a trip to the barren wilds of Alaska – where the climate is as frosty as the female McCains’ snotty demeanor. Bristol picked up on that right away. Having been around the block once or twice makes you more perceptive.

“Think of me as like a knocked up out of wedlock Laura Ingells”

Bristol paid Cindy McCain, John’s wife, the sort of back handed compliment of say that she was like a Queen, or at least like some one who played one on TV. The real Queen is actually much frumpier. As for McCain’s daughter Meghan, well Bristol didn’t take to her one bit. You’d think that two young women with parents in politics would be glad to pal around, but that stuck up Meghan came off like Nelly Olson to Bristol’s jumped up town tramp let whomever. In fact Meggers made such a foul impression that Bristol couldn’t help forming some very definite opinions. Those opinions are stated in Bristol’s aforementioned inspirational memoir, but will be reposted here for readers’ convenience:

Palin writes that the first time she met the 26-year-old daughter of Sen. John McCain, she “ignored us during the entire visit.” This was just before Senator McCain introduced Sarah Palin as his running mate. Palin adds that she “had a sneaking suspicion I might need to watch my back.”

“Every time we saw Meghan, she seemed to be constantly checking us out, comparing my family to hers and complaining,” she writes. “Oh the complaining.”

“I’d never seen people with so much Louis Vuitton luggage, so many cell phones, and so many constant helpers to do hair and makeup,” Palin writes.

not so fast – a folksy chimp who’s been around the block

Bristol might not like little snobs but she knows the better brand names! I’m sure she’s seeing even more Louis Vuitton since she got out of caribou country and took the world by storm. I’m not sure what her utterances are doing for her mother’s 2012 political aspirations. Maybe it makes her look like a folksy chip off of the old block. Sarah will be hungry for publicity in the next 18 months so Bristol might come in handy. The way Moma Palin’s been tearing around in her tour bus, riding Harley’s through the streets of Chicago, and tet et teting with The Donald (“I really like the way you shook Obama up and maybe I could use you in my campaign!“); then she ain’t to fussy about how she gets it. So a teenage pregnancy autobio combined with some public mouthing off might seem like a good idea.

Rogues and wild cards

However Sarah might want to think twice for once. These publicity stunts sometimes have a way of backfiring, especially when unpredictable young women are involved – remember the short lived reality TV project Bristol had in mind with ex sperm donor Levi Johnson (and don’t think that the liberal media ain’t gonna drag him up in time to derail the Palin bandwagon – so he’s some one else we’re gonna be seeing more of). After all going rogue does run in the family – at least among those zany Palin womenfolk. If the shit hits the fan then whatever chances Sarah’s got could go up in a puff of sound bites and late nite monologue zingers. While that might make politics a lot more gossipy, it would make gossip a lot sleazier. There’s been too much of that already!

Now here’s some more of that Hollywood mind control series:


Sarah Palin split Up Shocker!

If Arnold Schwarzenegger has shown us anything it’s that there’s a fine line between celebrity and politics. Of course many caught on to that when Ronald Reagan became the first Hollywood actor to play a president on TV, officially. Another thing Schwartzy has shown us is that there’s a fine line between politics and celebrity gossip. That’s a point Anthony Wiener recently underscored by way of Twitter. It’s one thing to underscore it, but Sarah Palin has made a livelihood out of it by way of her reality TV series, her frequent & tiresome public appearances, and the persistent threat that she may run for high office.

Sarah has kept us periodically entertained and frequently irritated with her family’s over the top antics; like such as teen aged pregnancies, illegitimate children, rogue son in laws, and the like. That’s when she’s not hunting caribou from helicopters with high powered rifles or dodging her numerous stalkers. With a powder keg personal life like that it was only a matter of time before the fireworks started, and if recent rumors are to be believed – and who doesn’t like to give them an ear – the match is in the tinder box!

What’s started tongues wagging was Sarah’s recent purchase of a pricey new pad. The pad in question is down in Scottsdale, Arizona. So she’s once again abandoned her beloved Alaska! The spread cost a bundle too. The mansion is estimated to be worth some where in the neighborhood of $2 million. That sounds like it must be some neighborhood! I guess inane antics must pay off!

Anyway the upshot is that Palin’s better half, hen pecked hubby Todd, seems to have no plans to move. He’s firmly rooted up north in Alaska. So this has everyone talking about some kind of secret split up. Now there have been rumors about bad news in the Palin marriage for awhile. Like the story going around that Sarah was having an affair with a local Wasilla snow mobile dealer named Brad Hanson. Brad is Todd’s partner in the dealership, and in more than that, according to the local tittle tattle.

It gets worse. Sources say that Sarah has thrown away her wedding ring in some sort of a huff. Further more she’s kicked Todd out of his coveted place in her bed. So basically the marriage is over. What’s more a secret Bill and Hillary type arrangement has been hammered out between the pair. Todd is to appear at Sarah’s side during important public occasions. Meanwhile everything from property division to child custody has already been agreed on. The idea is that Sarah’s gearing up for a 2012 presidential run, possibly with Donald Trump as running mate, and doesn’t want any nasty divorce ruining whatever chances that she has. She wants to keep all the family values FOX News viewers firmly in her corner. Hence the pretense. Sounds like a tense pretense!

This isn’t the end of Sarah’s machinations either. She placed daughter Willow under house arrest. Willow is a loose cannon and lightening rod for bad news. She was the but of one of David Letterman’s misdirected jokes. David made a crack about Willow getting it on with ARod during a trip to NYC. When the brouhaha broke out Dave backpedaled, claiming he meant to take a jab at older sister Bristol, but get’s all those little Palin sluts mixed up. Who doesn’t? Willow also got involved in some kind of homophobic rant on Facebook. Sarah put the clamps down on that. Even though she believes that marriage is something between a woman, a man, and possible his snowmobile dealership partner; she doesn’t want to antagonize anyone with a vote. Probably very wise. The upshot is that Willow has been pulled out of school and is being home schooled. Those little Palin sluts are just too damned dangerous to be let out in public and Sarah ain’t taking any chances!

All this grape vine rumor mill gossip leads to one very disturbing conclusion: Lucy Ricardo is actually serious about running for America’s highest office! Since republicans figure that Obama is invincible this time round – he did finish off Osama Bin Laden, which their diabolical hero George W made such a big deal about so they’re not in a position to say much, though they never shut up, at least on FOX – she’ll probably get the nomination. No real contender wants to waste the one shot at the brass ring. So the heavy weights are gonna wait until 2016. You’ll probably say “So what? She’ll never get it.” except that’s what everyone said about Ronald Reagan.

So that leaves President Sarah as a worst case scenario. That’s enough to set a tingle in the guts of even the least nervous among us. however you ought not to worry too much. If history repeats it’s self, as it is doomed to do, then if elected she’ll probably bail out half way through her term, perhaps to pursue a motion picture career in Hollywood. So that leaves us with only 2 yaers of mischief to worry about. Those two zany mad cap years could resurrect the careers of political satirist like Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.

Have you ever wondered why Hollywood celebrities seem be off their rockers on a regular basis? Well the answer to that is easy and straight forward. According tot he work of Fritz Springmeier it’s because they’re a pack of brain washed zombies. The poor little dears have been programmed using some pretty harsh mind control techniques developed by the CIA, in cooperation with the Illuminati, called Project Monarch. This is also why celebs, like Drew Barrymore, run in families. It’s because the predisposition to be brainwashed – which depends on be able to enter a disassociative state – is hereditary. The trouble is that the brainwashing has side effects, and every so often one of the beautiful people goes ca ca cuckoo! Don’t take my word for it though – here’s part one of a 28 part video documentary made by the good folks over @ pseudo occult media. You probably would’a though that this mind control stuff was crazy, before Charlie Sheen that is.


Sarah Palin’s ups & downs

It seems like where ever Sarah Palin shows her face these days there’s trouble. She just recently got past that embarrassing BristolLevi reunion and now she’s made her way onto youtube. Seems that Sarah was up in Alaskan, confronting former constituents, when a woman wearing a ‘worst governor ever’ t shirt decided to give Sarah a piece of her mind. Sarah fought back but was taken by surprise and so had an awkward defense.

Worst Governor Ever‘ is a little harsh. She wasn’t in office long enough to do a really bad job. Sarah is out there fighting for democracy in the form of increased military budgets, etc, but like many of democracy’s champions she seems a little taken aback when the people speak.

think of me as like the next Jon Gosellin, but with a pair

Now from worst governor ever to worst reality TV show ever. Worst reality TV show covers some territory, but when it comes to worst Levi Johnston has it covered. He and Bristol were ready to go a few months back. They also had a reality TV deal lined up. Bristol made and end run around her mother and announced her engagement to the world via the tabloid press. It’s easier to ask forgiveness than permission. Except in this case.

Levi had been screwing around and gotten some other chick pregnant. Bristol found that unacceptable and so cut him loose. Levi’s a trooper so the show is going on even if the engagement on which it was based isn’t.

As for all those who thought that Levi didn’t have it on the ball take note. The lad not only has a plan that he’s willing to stick to, but a Plan B. It shows some insight on the lad’s part too. Since all this started with Sarah Palin’s entry into politics, why not go back to the beginning to get a fresh start. With that in mind, and perhaps not (for there are still those who doubt Levi as anything in mind) Mr Johnston has declared his candidacy for Mayor of Wasillla, Sarah’s old job. ATTENTION Teabaggers: I wonder what the chances are of Levi winning on a Sarah Palin Protest Vote?


Here’s to togetherness!

Brangie vs the (gutter) press

Moksana might be at each other’s thoughts, both legally and literally of the leaked tape recorded conversations of an hysterical Mel ranting racist death threats against his former mistress are to be believed (in the world of journalism a run on sentenced is known as “gonzo“. That was originated by the late great Hunter Thompson who was freakishly gifted as a writer – bless his soul – but did like to write stoned and so sometimes lost track of where one sentence ended and another began. Sometimes he’d just mush several of them together!) – but there’s one couple who just don’t know when to quit – Brangelina. Brangelina, or Brangie for short, are not only solidly together, but are fighting mad about it. So much so that they’ve taken Brit tab News of the World to court over stories about the power couple disconnecting and even having a post nup type division of assets drawn up.

B-ish movie actress types
it wasn't easy including a martial arts finale in Paul W Anderson's 3 Musketeers but would a Milla Jovovich film really be the same without one?It hasn’t been a good few years for News of the World. They also lost a suit to Kate Beckinsale – the Underworld vampire who married Len Wisman. The News referred to Beckinsale as a “B movie actress” She took exception and sued. She also won an undisclosed sum. The News’ defense, that references to Ms. Beckinsale were a misprint, and that they meant Milla Jovovich, didn’t seem to help their defense any. BTW Milla is moving up in class: she’s featured as Milady in her husband Paul W Anderson’s new adaption of the 3 Musketeers! I just hope that the Milla Martial Arts Massacre Finale made the film’s final cut!
Make room for Jethro – Fail in the Family

Speaking of Follywood Family Values the Palin’s have another crisis: Bristol Palin has defied her mother and become engaged to Levi Johnston. Now Sarah Barracuda is no fan of Ricky Hollywood, ever since he sold out and began spilling shit about her. When questioned about it by reporters she did mention that the lad might be welcome in her house for Thanksgiving, but only after being grilled in the oven for several hours and served up honey glazed with an apple in his mouth. So you can kind of take that 2 ways. Since Sarah’s bagged bigger, meaner creatures than Levi he might probably take it as a warning. That’s what Bristol seems to have taken it as, & so bypassed telling Mom in favour of blurting the news out through the tabloids. So it was presented to Mom as a fait accompli, or “it’s easier to ask forgiveness than permission” in other words!

Teen pregnancy, reality TV, and other consequences
Now you can’t blame Sarah for having reservations. Bristol is her eldest, and has been a target for entertainment industry bullies, like David “I’m into creepy stuff” Letterman! So naturally she wants to make sure that Bristol has a guy who can both provide for her daughter and protect her. Quite frankly this Levi fellow comes off as shiftless (and useless!).
next stop Sunnyvale Trailer Park!
However Sarah needn’t worry. Bristol and Levi have their immediate future all worked out. They’re planning a reality TV series (what else?) based on their life together as the 2 most famous young Alaskans on the planet. With a deal like that in the works they should be able to land a million dollar check from some desperate cable TV producers. If the show’s as promising as it sounds, it might even keep them busy right up to mid season replacements. Besides with some minor retooling – like replacing Todd with Mel Gibson as crusty family patriarch, and rewriting Sarah as Dingbat, they might have a bona fide hit on their hands!

So that covers about everyone except the Lohan’s! Remember the post from a few days back pointing out that jail was a Lohan family tradition? Well Dad might be joining Lindsay, since he’s been charged with 2nd degree harassment for threatening to kill current gal pal and Jon Gosselin cast off Kate Major. According to Major she was sleeping one off when Big Mike barged in, called her a “fucking cunt”, and threw her to the ground by overturning her chair. Mikey L counter claims that Major was drunk off her ass when he made the threat so how can she swear to it? – oops!

who’s the creep peepin at Palin?

Stalking Sarah and Tailin’ Palin

Sarah Pepsi Palin continues to put the fizz in your cola!

Some gals, like Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Megan Fox, just seem to attracted a strange obsessive attention. Next to Britney & co. no one attracts attention like Sarah Palin. Though John McCain is responsible for letting the Palin Genie out of the bottle, liberal media types are responsible for keeping the legend alive. Though seriously liberal types might be inclined to ignore her on the basis that she’s a nice lady with some kooky ideas, the spin doctors seem to think that something can be made of her, other than a farce.

Creepy Joe & sincere too

With that in mind, Joe McGuinness, a creepy author with an angle to play, as taken a summer lease in Alaska, and directly next door to the Palin property. While some people are saying that this comes off as stalkerish & creepy, Joe responds that “Creepy is as creepy does” – whatever that means. He also insists that this is ‘field research’, and also stems from his great love for Alaska and desire to see it personally. So now here’s Creepy Joe to explain what in the hell he thinks he’s doing:

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the super hero formerly known as Sara Barracuda

“If you wanna get to know me better then facebook me – like all those other slightly creepy guys!”

Now Creepy Joe ain’t gonna call Sarah some kind of Nazi, though he insists that she has unleashed the slobbering rabid hounds of hell upon us. Some might remark that if you have a sore sport the wisest thing is to stop picking at it until it goes away. However I can’t help thinking that if his penchant for wild overstatement is any indication than this is gonna be one humdinger of a book! Besides, at least he’s found a woman close to his own age range to stalk, unlike Dr. Drew Pinsky who is probably Gawker Stalking Lindsay Lohan even now!

sarah palin bondage tickle torture



Sarah Palin TV Deal

The naked kid was right!

Remember when Levi Johnson – the young hockey player turned Playgirl centerfold – said that Sarah Palin was pissed off with politics because everyone was offering her book & TV deals that she wanted to take advantage of? Well it looks like the naked guy was right. Sarah’s already gone on the New York Times Bestsellers List with her Going Rogue. Now she is on the bring of sealing a deal with the Discovery Channel. Science and Sarah might seem like an odd combination because Sarah has some radical views on evolution and birth control. Her views on money are the same as any other Republican, and most Democrats. So I guess that if the check clears she’ll soon be a regular on the DC. Here’s hoping that she can’t see dinosaurs, nor even woolly mammoth, from her window in Alaska.


Briston Palin Opens a PR Firm

So this isn’t the basis for a reality TV series?

They grow up so fast. One day they’re getting knocked up by high school hockey player, the next their opening public relations firms, and allegedly helping funnel money around the Republican Party back rooms. At least she’s taking an interest in the family business. She’s also doing some thing credible with her life; almost as credible as what Levi Johnson is doing with his!

levi johnson naked playgirl

Credibility problems: Why settle for credibility when you can be completely incredible?

The politicians have been the professional reality TV players for years, you can’t blame them for not wanting to get blatantly into the business. Then Reality TV performers might feel that they have a real shot at public office. Sarah Palin’s campaign is as close to “Octomom for President” as most sane people ever want to get!

An incredible image!

BTW look over Levi’s right should and in the steam you can see the image of Sarah Palin! Now is that a miraculous event, subliminal advertising, or some one’s idea of a joke?


Sarah Palin dodges a bullet

She’s got more than glasses and an up do in common with Wonder Woman

That hour might have had 2 or 3 too many minutes for Ms Mary Walsh. Canadian comedian Mary Walsh is an old dab hand at making fools of politicians. They’re usually such easy targets that’s there’s hardly any sport in it. So I guess that she figured that taking a swipe at Sarah Palin would be like shooting fish in a barrel. What could possibly go wrong (That’s what John McCain thought)?

sarah palin wonder woman

If we know anything about Sarah it’s that things never quite work out the way you’d expect. In the American political scene she’s a joker in a deck of deuces. So when poor Mary started asking a few innocent questions as a build up to some coup de grace, Sarah burly body guards gave Ms Walsh the bum’s rush (believe that’s not as much fun as it sounds!). So poor Mary’s stunt would up backfiring, or at least turning out a little anti climactic. As for Sarah, don’t underestimate this chick!

Mary Walsh Warrior Princess

ha ha nelson muntz

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