Nadya Octomom Suleman’s Stripper Past!

The Nadya Suleman story continues to unfold with bizarre new twists and turns – so to speak. After a former acquaintance claimed that she and Octomom performed a stripper act together for two years, the controversial mother of 14 felt she had to some forward and set the record straight.
Nadya comes clean – ‘I can explain’
By her own admission Nadya was a stripper, or as she prefers to call it ‘a topless exotic dancer’. However she wants the public to know that it’s not as bad as jealous former colleagues are making it out. Nadya reveals, with plenty of mitigating spin, that she was only 19. It was an impressionable and experimental time in her life. It started innocently enough with a lingerie contest!
It was very sweet and innocent, in a dirty sort of way
Now everyone can understand the need to feel some pride in our appearance. Most of us accomplish this through exercise, grooming, diet, personal hygiene, and a thoughtfully selected wardrobe. Nadya attempted to boost her self esteem by parading around in her undies. If you’ve been paying attention to the story so far you know that Nadya has her own way of doing things.
performance enhancing nudity
Nadya quite proudly reveals that she came in second. The girl who won, Nadya states, only beat her by performing “some disgusting lesbian act” that Nadya “could never do“. I guess that’s Nadya’s way of denying the girl on girl act allegations, though it may not make any friends in the gay community. Never mind, she can handle that later. 
Hey doc, what’s up?
2nd place was good enough to get Octomom a job offer to perform in what she describes as a ‘gentleman’s club‘. Nadya makes it sound very up scale. Just to be clear these are the kind of gentlemen who like to stuff bills down ladies g stings, and may have a ‘rabbit fetish‘. Though flattered by the offer, and seriously considering it, she backed out after she realized the whole deal might not be so genteel. Nadya claims that when she noticed other topless exotic dancers giving clients lap dances, she was back out through the door like a shot! Just because they were gentlemen didn’t mean that Nadya was going to think of herself as anything less than a lady.
A consummate, mad loony
So where are we after hearing Nadya’s side off the story? Well she only admits to this after a former colleagues claims that they did a racy act together for 2 years (and performed at bachelor parties!). She makes a point of denying the worst of the allegations repeatedly through out her story – “I was merely an innocent girl who enjoyed taking her close of for nice men. Nothing kinky whatsoever!” She does however admit to being afraid that some photos from her experimental days might come to light. Perhaps this is why she’s owning up now. We’ve also learned that Octomom has some talent as an amateur spin doctor: “I was crazy; but crazy interesting, not crazy scary!” She has been following Angelina Jolie’s playbook! Oh yeah, and we know that Octomom sure like attention, and she’ll take it however she can get it!
Speaking of rabbit fetishes, singer Andrea Corr first came to public attention playing a character called Sharon Rabbite (who thinks these names up?), in the film The Commitments. That was back in the early 90’s. By 2000 she was voted the world’s most beautiful woman, until ousted by Aishwarya Rai. In fairness to Ms Corr, Rai didn’t get the title by vote, but was proclaimed such by Julia Roberts. Andrea also toured with her brother and sisters in the popular singing group The Corrs. The Corrs split up and Andrea went onto a solo singing career, releasing an album called Ten Feet Tall. At 5’1″ we might assume that Ms Corr has some height issues.
The album wasn’t really a chart buster. Andrea had deglammed her image, Perhaps she was tired of being seen as a pretty girl, and wanted to see if she could be taken seriously on her music alone. Questionable choice since the music industry is full of talented people who never become household names. Packaging counts!
So what has Ms Corr been doing with herself lately? Well Corr fans will be happy to know that Ms Corr has scored big time. Her boyfriend Brett Desmond proposed to her on Christmas of last year. He layed a $100 000+ diamond ring on her while they were vacationing in the Bahamas. Now Bret can well afford lavish gifts and Caribbean vacations because his dad is billionaire Dermot Desmond. So it looks like little Andrea has bagged big game. This guy should be able to keep her in tin whistles for life! 

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Ashley Biden Caught Cokin It Up?

Ashley Biden Caught on Tape Using Cocaine?
In the age of video, YouTube, and the Internet, celebrities are, from time to time, caught doing something foolish and are exposed for the entire world to see. The latest to fall prey to this is the adult daughter of the Vice President, Ashley Biden.

Hail to the Mischief!

Tomorrow’s National Enquirer is one you’ll want to get. They’re breaking a big story about Joe Biden’s daughter Ashley. According to the NE some one is shopping around a 40 min video of Biden’s daughter coking it up!
Livin la Vida Lohan?
The video shows what appears to be a drug transaction between Ms Biden and a male. In the video Ms Biden is shown sorting at least 4 lines through a dollar bill (or a red straw, accounts vary). At one point she jokes with the man that the lines aren’t big enough. 
It’s not what you know, or who you know; it’s what you know about who you know!
The video is being shopped around to the usual source – National Enquirer, RadarOnLine, NY Post, and an unnamed Brit tabloid (if it’s legit they’ll pay top dollar!). The seller is asking a modest $250 000 (the original asking price was $2 mill). A source at Radar claims to have seen the tape, and claims the women looks identical to Vice Pres Biden’s daughter. The seller is being represented by a lawyer – Tom Dunlap of of Dunlap, Grubb, & Weaver, since the video was (obviously) taken without Ashley Biden’s consent. Selling it could prove tricky!
Easily lead, or under the influence?
According to some unsubstantiated Internet gossip Ashley has had a coke problem for years. If the tape is legit that’s a safe bet. You don’t just wake up at 27 and decide to go drugging. Ashley is also said to be a some what naive girl, one with poor judgement and easily lead. She also lacks trustworthy close friends to keep her out of mischief.
If this is true then the neocons are gonna have a field day, or even a feeding frenzy. They’ll be looking for payback over Bristol Palin.  Every neocon that is but the possible exception of Rush Limbaugh. He’ll be too busy down at the drug store getting multiple forged prescriptions filled. The pill poppin’ did bring his weight under control. The Pill Popper Rush was the best Limbaugh’s looked in years!
“It is impossible to be defrauded in the financial markets because there are so many safeguards, so many checks and balances, and such rigorous oversight by the SEC.”
~Bernie Madoff
Daily Dharma: Chinese Buddhists urge international cooperation in scripture researches
Update: Tom Dunlap, the lawyer representing the Ashely Biden cocaine tape seller has reportedly dropped his client, citing negative publicity. Source RadarOnLine. The seller is believed to be a former boyfriend of Ms Biden’s and claims to have some illegal drugs with her on other occasions. Ms Biden’s friend claims the he knows even more incriminating stuff about the VP’s daughter. If the price is right, he’ll spill his guts.
The mystery man claims that Ms Biden was fully aware that she was being recorded. At one point during the tape she even waved at the camera.
As for Ashley, this isn’t her first run in. In 2002 she was arrested for obstruction of justice when she yelled, and spit at, a cop who was arresting a friend of hers for disorderly conduct. The charges were eventually dropped. 

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Suffering Sappho – pix from the scene of Lohan’s weekend flip out!

It’s pop o matic trouble!

By now everyone has heard about Lindsay Lohan’s rumble with Ronson last week end. This occurred during what proved to be a wild Lohan style week end that only Lindsay could pull off. There were late night drinking and drugging binges (allegedly), trips to visit Jack Nicholson in the wee hours of the morning, and online Twitter freak outs! 
Beware the Ides of March!
The whole thing was set off when a warrant was issued for Ms Lohan on March 13 – other wise known as Friday the 13th. Apparently Lohan wasn’t complying with some court order over some arrest for some  hit and run that happened a year of so back. There have been so many that you can’t really blame Lindz for losing track. Besides her recall (and grammar too, if some online messages are any indication) is not everything that it could be. When Lindz heard about the warrant she completely lost it. She whipped off a missive to Perezhilton, full of spelling errors, claiming that the warrant story was fabricated and could blow every deal she’s got going. I doubt that she’s got anything going, and what ever she’s got can’t be worth going ballistic over.
Anyway that sent La Lohan into a weekend long tail spin. During the way she had a 5 alarm blow out with Samantha Ronson. That was on Saturday morning, about 11 AM. She’d returned from her special tete e tete with Nicholson several hours previous (the English phrase might be heart to heart, but the French are just so much more knowing about these things. It’s their legendary savior faire). The source of the argument seemed to be some DJ engagement that Ronson had. Ronson couldn’t get out of it, and Lindsay could go with because she wasn’t allowed to leave the state. So the lid blew straight off.
Between 11 AM & 12 PM the neighbours phoned the police. They got alarmed when they heard the sounds of ‘something’ hitting the walls. Plus stuff was flying out of the windows, and that was leaving glass scattered around everywhere. Then there was the obscene yelling. By the time the police showed up everything was calm, and no one answered the door. So they had to go away empty handed. However we know that World War 3 went down on the premises (although I suppose that we really have to say World War 4 in our post Bush era, just to be accurate), because there are plenty of picture from ground zero – and here they are!
Hunting for beaver, loaded for bear
It looks like they had the SWAT team out. Then again from what the neighbours are saying, the frightful sounds emanating from the premises made them fear that Chris Brown might be beating Rihanna with OJ Simpson inside! As it turned out, it was only a couple of scared, coked up, boozed out lesbians. Still it would’ve be a good idea to bring along the riot gear and tear gas, just to be on the safe. At least some pepper spray.
You might be glad to know that Lohan’s madcap weekend has ended well enough. Ronson managed to get off to her gig, so some one will be bringing money into the household. 3 or 4 kind ladies with AA Blue Books showed up after the cops left, and stayed until Lindz could get it together (though that alone might have driven many of use to drink!) Lindsay and Sam are still together, because at this point who else would have either of them?? As for the warrant that started the whole commotion, well that’s been dropped. Seems that the courts are describing it as no big deal. So Lindsay won’t be going to jail, or not just yet (though she may give rehab another try). Jack Nicholson must have some clout in that town!! So it this Happily Ever After, or To Be Continued
Remember, when life hands you a lemon, throw in some club soda and whiskey – then shake violently!!
I never give you my pillow

I only send you my invitations
And in the middle of the celebrations
I break down

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Weekend Gossip Overload

Something look wrong here? We’ve had a catastrophe. Read about it here.

The week is over and what a week it was, but lo and behold there is still more outrageous gossip spewing out of the sewer known as Hollywood! For instance Adriana Lima’s husband NBA pro basket baller Marco Jaric is being investigated for sexual assault! Philadelphia Police are investigating claims that he assaulted a woman in that fair city when his team the Grizzlies we’re recently playing there. That would’ve been last month. Lima and Jaric were married on Valentine’s Day. So it would’ve placed the alleged assault pretty close to the marriage. 
Jaric official spokespersons are pretty adamant in declaring “like no way man – he’s married to Lima!” Well not in so many words, but they have said that the allegations are 100% false, that Mr & Mrs Jaric are 100% in love, and that high profile celebrity couples can become targets for these type of charges. 
Now while everyone is saying “Yeah right!“, that is for the one’s who aren’t saying “Isn’t Adriana Lima that underwear virgin?“, let me just say Alexandra Paressant! If you’ll recall she was that Myspace wacko who claimed to have scored with Tony Parker at his Paris wedding to Eva Longoria.  X17 Online backed her up, being happy to break the story. They even claimed to have text messages to prove Parker’s infidelity with Mme Paressant. When the dust cleared not only was Paressant not involved with Parker, but she wasn’t a model, may not really be French, and in fact no one has yet managed to prove she was even a woman! A credibility black eye for X17! So lets not cook Jaric’s goose before the pigeons come home to roost, lest we wind up with egg on our faces. Now how’s that for mixing – or even scrambling – metaphors? Don’t count your scandals before they’re hatched.
Bogus Spy Chick – Image wrangler
There’s more: Yahoo News is reporting that Angelina Jolie may be pregnant again! Apparently Supermom requested some stunts in her new movie Salt to be recast – Salt is the spy flick where she’ll be playing Tom Cruise. Apparently alot of stuff like back flips, and other dangerous moves that might prove risky to potential moms had to be taken out. Also the recent shots in the film have been concentrating more on close ups. This has sparked rumours that undeterred (or at least under deterred) by the media fiasco known as Octomom – with whom any likeness to Angelina Jolie is unintended and coincidental – Jolie is up to her old ways.
Now these new pregnancy rumours have most folk screaming STOP THE INSANITY. Perhaps the only people welcoming the coming round of Brangelina melodrama might be  Octomom Nadya Suleman – hoping for some spin off publicity (maybe the media could start a running score – Jolie 8: Octomom 14?); and Chris Brown – hoping that it might take attention off of himself. Of course this sort of thing usually happens when ever Angie is hyping a movie or up for an award – she gets pregnant and has some relationship drama with Brad Pitt. This time Pitt is rumoured to be doing the nanny. In fact it seems like Angie is getting predictable in her old age. She doesn’t need to be too inventive anymore. One more outrageous pregnancy, maybe invitro triplets; and the resulting People cover payday, and she can retire from the game for good.
Finally Jessica Simpson is opening her mouth and trying to score points by saying things that she thinks everyone will agree with. This time it’s on the subject of domestic abuse and battery. With Chris Brown and Rihanna the hottest story on the planet right now – unless Angelina Jolie really is pregnant again – or even more startling planning sex change surgery (“I think I’d make a really cool dude and father for the boys. I’m trying to get Brad to get the sex change too. He doesn’t want to but I’m working on him!“)  – Jess thinks that she can drum up support by telling every one how wrong she things beaten on people is.
In Jess’s words if a woman is in an abusive relationship then she should ‘run and not walk’ away. Jess goes on to say that she was in an abusive relationship, though she doesn’t say that she was physically assaulted. She doesn’t say who the man was either, though people think that she’s taking a swipe at Nick Lechay, or maybe John Mayer. That would of course not be considering the dozens of other guys she’s been with since her Lechay bust up.
Jess is basically trying to get support by saying something that everyone agrees with on an issue that is front and center right now. The trouble with that is that it’s phony and clumsy – like an Oscar winner thanking baby seals during their acceptance speech. People think that with the timing Jess is just trying to prove something, or get some positive spin. So they’re not ready to buy it. Besides, if she really wanted to get relevant again then she should put that 20 pounds back on. It maybe counter intuitive, but when the world discovered that she was fat, she went from playing at chili cook offs to making national news. Even Pres Barack Obama had to share the cover of a national mag with her, and then address that with Matt Lauer – taking valuable time out from discussing the Superbowl – as he does in 4:32 of the following video.
There you go! Never underestimate the influence of entertainment gossip! Don’t be afraid to make the counter intuitive choice sometimes, either!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Anna Nicole Smith is back with a vengeance & Howard K Stern is in the soup

Stern & doctors slapped with felony charges – bail is 20 000

By now everyone has heard the news that long time Anna Nicole Smith ‘companion’ Howard K Stern has turned himself in, and is under arrest. Stern, along with a pair of ANS doctors (Dr Khristine Eroshevich and Dr Sandeep Kapoor are accused of illegally supplying the troubled starlet with a plethora of prescription medications. At the time people believed he may have deliberately offed his companion. Though they did have a rocky relationship, they had just had a ‘commitment ceremony’, and Stern had been named guardian of her infant daughter Dannilynn. Smith was also still quarrelling fort about 500 million from her late husband – the 90 year old oil billionaire. So the was plenty of motive for Stern to do something nasty.
Who’s your daddy?
When Anna Nicole Smith died unexpectedly just shy of her 40th birthday, the finger of suspicion pointed fairly directly at Stern. Smith’s son Daniel had died only months before at he age of 19. An autopsy indicated that he’d died from a prescription medication reaction – excepted some of those meds were believed to have been supplied by Stern. Stern was even witnessed flushing pills down the toilet while young Daniel was in hospital. Even Smith her self at one point accused Stern of ‘killing’ her son. He was now next in line to the loot, after Anna herself and the girl who Anna herself had legally declared his daughter. Although she may have meant accidentally. Stern could be pretty free with the pills. 
‘conspiracy’ among the charges – the bail is low, but the prosecutors seem loaded for big game
That’s what’s led him in to trouble this time. The question isn’t whether Stern wanted her dead, but whether he is legally responsible for her death through illegal activities. The exact nature of the charges is that the pair of doctors – who are also under arrest – knowingly misprescribed meds for Anna Nicole, and that Stern procured them illegally, under his own name, and then passed them on to Smith (Many of the pills found after her death were actually prescribed in his name). Since this is illegal, and resulted in Smith’s death, Stern is facing some pretty heavy charges. Those charges may have nothing to do with whether Stern deliberately killed her to get the loot – although their are many people who believe that her helped her on her way with money in mind. They seem merely based on the fact that Smith died as a result of Stern’s illegal actions. That can lead to a range of charges like manslaughter, criminal negligence, and one of the lesser homicide charges.  Depending what kind of a package prosecutors put together against him, and what they can make stick, that can result in just as much time behind bars as if he held a gun to her head, while holding her check book in the other hand. Of course we know that the doctors will provide some very cooperative testimony, to get themselves off the hook. That further points the finger of culpability at Mr Stern. It looks like that fellow is in a world of trouble. 
Now for Howard K, Adnan Ghalib, Bernie Madoff, and all those other hi profile lawbreakers – whether accused or convicted, here’s a little music video dedication done on location at San Quentin Prison.
… and here’s another litle one, a true classic.
Some bad news and some good news for our little jail birds: I hear that prison’s are switching back to black and white stripes for their uniforms (see CBS 48 Hours’ “Picture Perfect” episode), the good news, the art of the escape tunnel is coming back with a vengeance.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Big Love

Britney Spears is a sexual terrorist!
If you’ve heard about it then you’ve heard right – Britney Spears’ ex paparazzi boyfriend Adnan Gahlib is in danger of deportation. Not back to Birmingham, England either but to war torn Afghanistan! Seems that Mr Ghalib had a few run ins with some officers of the court. In fact he even pinned one process server by the knees with the bumper of his car.
She’s Chaotic and 5 kinds of toxic
Normally this is a matter of little consequence for your average smug and ungrateful America, but for Adnan it could spell major trouble. You see even though Adnan has not seen Afghanistan since he was 5, he never did bother to do anything about his citizenship. Now that was an oversight because if the court finds him guilty of a felony and deports him, then he could be getting a very up close and personal look at one of the most dangerous spots on the planet. Since Afghanistan is still on the State Dept’s shit list, I’m not sure how much leniency he can expect. Who could’ve guessed when Britney plucked him out from obscurity and at random that he would turn out like this? Screwing a rich, famous, and confused young woman might’ve seemed like a good idea at the time. If he gets booted out it could really put a monkey wrench in his plans to sell a tell all and this infamous sex tape. Still whenever in the history of entertainment gossip has anything like this ever happened? Britney Spears still is the best PR in years!
Staying on our love theme, HBO and it’s show Big Love, about the sexiest believers in Christendom – those swingin’ Mormons – looks like it’s ready to attract more trouble by breaking more ground. An episode to be aired on Sunday shows one of the churches top secret rituals, called an ‘endowment’. Church insiders insist that though this is too sacred to be profaned, and that people might not understand it taken out of it’s larger context; it is really one of their sects charming little eccentricities. It’s where church members learn how to get past the angels and into heaven by learned secret handshakes and pass words. Sounds kind of Masonic!
Anyway the Church is threatening to boycott the show, and HBO, unless the cable network comes to it’s sense. HBO says that they’re deeply sorry about giving away Mormon secrets, and that they hope the Latter Day Saints won’t be upset – or worse still boycott – but they’re sticking to their guns. The show is gonna go on! I don;’t think that the Tony Soprano network has too many Mormon regulars anyway. Then again with all this talk about ‘endowments’ and secret handshakes you can’t really be sure what weirdness they might be into. You gotta say one thing, that no matter how much trouble sex stirs up, playing with fire is still one of America’s great national pass times.
Now from my spies at the National Enquirer, here’s a preview of next week’s cover!
Another Octomom story  -I can see why Angelina Jolie’s depressed; that used to be her on the cover.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Regis Philbin’s Son – Game show host ignores Pentagon retiree who served America

Regis strikes out as a dad

Regis Philbin doels out the dough on his Who Wants to Be a millionaire, but in real life he can be tight fisted. He also won’t be getting any father of the year awards. His daughter came to public attention when the National Enquirer reveals that she was a crack addict and circling the drain. Now Philbin’s son is in some serious trouble. His son Danny also managed to get himself into the pages of the National Enquirer, after a much publicized suicide attempt, and here’s the insider story:
son goes ‘batty’
Though a double amputee, Danny still managed to hold down a job with the Pentagon. His condition did put a strain on his marriage. According to his estranged wife Judy Philbin, Danny kept insisting that he could no longer function as a complete man and husband to her. His suggestion was that she find a man to have an affair with, to fulfill her sexual needs. Whether out of malice, or naivety, Judy took him at his word. When Danny found out, he went nuts. Armed with a baseball bat he went on a destruction spree, and broke everything in the house – including Judy’s prized Waterford crystal! he then capped the incident off with an attempted over dose on Darvron and Xanax. That’s when friends intervened and took him to Loma Linda Medical Center. After treatment with a stomach pump, he was then confined to the psych ward. 
Regis swings into action…
Now Regis may have his short comings but one thing you can say is that he’s there for his kids; once the situation gets critical and is leaked to the press. Judy notified the Enquirer about the sad state of affairs, and Regis announced that he had swung into action. If another e mail of Danny’s is any indication however, Philbin’s support seems to be more of the moral variety (the kind that don’t cost you anything but allows you to tell some one what to do and gets you off the hook with the public – “Well if he won’t follow my advice what can I do for him??”) Danny claims that he was informed by his father’s business managers that his 5000 allowance was being cut back. Danny further goes ion to reveal that they never actually visited him to access his situation. They have no idea what is required by a retired wheel chair bound retiree” he says.
… but will he get on the ball?
So it looks like a bleak situation for Danny Philbin. Even more so since Danny ends his letter with some pathetic revelations delivered in the 3rd person: “The son in the wheel chair now lives alone with no real means of protection, but sleeps with a baseball bat next to his bed“. I can only hope that Regis gets on the ball, for the sake of his public image if nothing else. Celebrities are having image malfunctions left, right, and center these days, so it pays to stay on your toes. Besides, having one messed up kid might be bad luck, having two makes you look like Ryan O Neil! Then again Regis didn’t make it rich by throwing around a lot of money – oh yeah, in fact he did, it just wasn’t his money. Maybe Nadya Suleman could do something for Danny Philbin? If the rumours about her checking out million dollar mansions are any indication she seems to be doing OK!
News from the Mother Ship – this just in!!
What’s Tom Cruise up to these days?? About 5’7″, and he’s gearing Katie up for another pregnancy! Rumour has it that Katebot is on a strict detox regime to make her womb Thetan ready! That’s why she’s looking even more lobotomized than usual lately! Tom hasn’t forgotten about the bright lights of Hollywood though. He has a master plan to restore his popularity with a project based on a little known 1970’s TV Sci Fi drama, and he’s begging President Barack Obama to co star in it with him – click here for the gory details! Good luck, Major Tom, and I hope that the Obama Effect pays off for you! Oh yeah, and “Free The Home World!
Now how’s that for a Spaced Out Sunday? Well then what about this?? It’s life, but not as we know it.
More head cases with a plan for the future – where have we heard that before??
People don’t change; they only become more so.
Theirs is a peaceful mission, thought I’d feel more reassured if their phasers weren’t locked on
Ever hear the old phrase ‘the road to hell is paved with good intentions’? Well it seemed like a good idea at the time. In this case the good idea is called The Venus Project – Though it sounds like a lost Star Trek episode, it actually refers to a world where there is nothing we can’t accomplish, armed with the weapons of mass creation! It only requires a complete collapse of the world around us. Apart from noting that ‘weapons’ is an odd choice of word to apply to the instruments of creation, I can only mention that the high minded visionaries forgot to reckon with the fact that we’re still inside the obsolete institutions that they’re so eagerly knocking down! Their commitment to improve world conditions at the expense of the inhabitants reminds me of HAL 9000 in 2001 A Space Odyssey, and makes me feel like an occupant of the World Trade Center on 911! At least they’re not telling us that this is gonna hurt them more than it hurts us. There’s no need to insult people’s intelligence while you’re inflicting your vision of the future on them. That would be adding insult to injury!
A Habitat for Humanity or more mad men with a plan – just like Hitler!
They have plans for your future, that don’t include you. It’s a truly frightening dystopian vision of the world to come that might well have frozen the blood of Aldous Huxley or George Orwell solid in their veins! Faced with this technocracy, I think that the only question any post modernist can ask is “How can I stop this??” … and they say there’s no Illuminati. I like their idea of creating a better world through expressing contempt though. It’s what Mocksure is about! As for political vandalism, that’s best left to the high minded idealists. As for foiling super villains planning a new and better world, that’s really more of a job for James Bond.
PS. Even though the Venus Project claims to be the thinking of analytically minded techies, they have no clear plan about how they’re gonna accomplish their brave new world. Their rosy future seems to be encompassed by the catch all phrase ‘technology’. They have some very clear and specific ideas about how they plan to tear everything down, like you quiting your job. I guess they’ve given that more thought. To put it in practical terms you might well ask them “how many people do you plan on killing to get this thing off the ground?” Certainly any one who disagrees with them for a start. Well sacrifices will have to be made, like your jobs; and you can’t make an omelet without breaking eggs. There in lies a fundamental problem with utopias.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Britney Spears’ Stolen Diaries About to be Leaked??

She’s even more fucked up than we dreamed!

I hope that you’re ready for tomorrow’s National Enquirer because it’s gonna be a humdinger! Their lead story is “Britney Spears In A Panic“. Now why is Britney in a panic more so than usual?? well it seems that her private diaries have been stolen. Britney wrote them during her darkest hours, as a future record for Sean P and Jayden J. It explains some of her more outlandish behaviour too. For instance:
Britney hears voices! She’s heard them for years, and she answers them too. The voices tell her to do stuff – mostly go and hide.
The real reason Britney shaved her head is that she feared an electronic transmitter had been planted in her hair and she didn’t know how to get rid of it.
When Britney took her kids hostage it was because she was messed up on methamphetamine – crystal meth. She did threaten to kill the boys.
Britney never intended to divorce Kevin Federline. She just wanted to show him that she was the boss. According to the diaries she’s still in love with him.
She busted up with Justin Timberklake after he’d found out that she’d had an abortion.
Rumour has it that Sam Lutfi is leaking the stuff to discourage Jamie Spears from taking legal action against him. Sam openly boasted about slipping meds – Respiradon and others – into Britney’s food to keep her controllable. That’s illegal – administering a noxious substance.
Read more at OhNoTheyDidn’t!

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

Did the butler do it? – & by butler read the druggie nanny

New developments in the John Travolta case – although it’s still technically the Jett Travotla case. When last we heard from John he was giving various accounts of Jett’s ‘misfortune’, with widely differing details: Jett died of a head injury, there was no head injury and he died of a seizure, he’d been alone for almost 18 hours when he was found, the nanny never left his side, he was dead when they found him, and he was alive when taken to the hospital. The story seemed to evolve over time, and become more elaborate with each telling.
Then there were the extortionists. It seems that corrupt Bahamians – some of whom were Travolta’s close personal friends -were trying to shake him down for money. Initially it was 20 mill, though this detail changed too: it was later upgraded to 25 mill, as if to add emphasis. Though a couple of local big wigs lost their jobs over that one, they insisted that they were innocent, and Senator Pleasant Bridgewater even insisted she would fight to vindicate herself no matter what it took. I’m told by some Caribbean friends that you don’t ever want to make a Caribbean woman angry. It’s just not worth it.
So while the world waited for the other shoe to drop, it did! A document got released calling the Travoltas even further into question. The document in question was a refusal to transport, and it was a kind of public relations black eye for Mr Kotter’s most likely to succeed. Now what refusal to transport means is that when the ambulance showed up, John and Kelly didn’t want to hand Jet over. Since the ambulance is on the hook for this, next of kin have to sign a waiver saying that they refuse transport. It releases the ambulance from liability. Now the idea that John and Kelly were bickering with the EMT while their beloved son was dying nearby doesn’t exactly make them look like mother and father of the year.
Apparently the Bahamians had even more ammunition. There has been some talk about tape recorded conversations between the Bahamian officials and representatives of the Travolta family. These have now been handed over to the FBI, who are giving it the CSI treatment with their voice analysis specialists. So perhaps this seemed like the ideal time for whomever – we’ll call them unnamed sources for the sake of convenience – to drop the latest bombshell. That bombshells comes in the form of a story on the National Enquirer’s website that John’s very good friend Jeff Kathrein, known to the world as ‘The Manny’ – the man who’s job it was to mind Jett, had only just completed a Scientology drug rehab program. This is confirmed by a Scientology watch website.
So this would seem to point a finger of blame in the general direction of Mr Kathrein. That is if he had been some how incapacitated, or merely incompetent, due to some unresolved drug issue. it’s convenient too. Now that the Bahamians seem to be fighting back with a vengeance (I’m told that they’re known for that), it would set up another convenient scape goat – fall guy, should such a thing ever be necessary. John and Kelly didn’t do anything wrong – it was corrupt Bahamians fiddling with records so that they could set up a blackmail shakedown. If it wasn’t corrupt Bahamians then it was merely a case of good natured John being too trusting, and leaving his kid with a nanny on drugs. Why that’s just the sort of thing that any parent who cares too much might do! However depending on what the FBI finds on those tapes, who’s speaking, how nervous they get, and how they responded to federal pressure (better than Hollywood rat Anne Hathaway, John might hope), things might be a little past blame it on the nanny (‘the butler did it’?)

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

JohnTravolta – Developing Scandal??

Now a brief update on the rapidly developing John Travolta story. John got himself in the news when his son Jett died mysteriously during a Bahamian vacation. Jett was rumoured to have Autism, though the Travoltas never publicly admitted to this. Autism is frowned upon by personal empowerment cult Scientology – to which the Travoltas belong. So perhaps it seemed better to say he had Kawasaki Syndrome, and blame it on an overly conscientious use of rug cleaners. The upshot was that when Jett died of a seizure condition for which he was not receiving treatment, the grape vine went into over drive.
Some speculated that the unfortunate lad had died during some kind of Scientology purification ritual. These rumours were fueled by inconsistencies in the reports about Jett’s death: he was dead when the family found him, he was alive when found and then rushed to the hospital, he died of a head injury sustained in a fall, he died of a seizure, he’d been alone for almost 18 hours when found, and his care taker never left his side and slept in the same room 8 feet from the boy’s head. The fact that some hasty funeral arrangements, including a removal of the boy’s liver and rapid cremation, were made didn’t quell the sort of suspicions that arise whenever Scientology is even remotely associated with some one’s death.
Well it seems like there is a convenient explanation for all those inconsistencies. John was being blackmailed by his very good friend – Bahamian cabinet minister Obie Wilchcombe, and the fellows 2 co horts: the ambulance driver named Tarino Lightbourne and a Bahamian senator, Ms Pleasant Bridgewater! Naturally resignations and arrests followed. It was inferred that any inconsistencies in the official reports might be the result of the dishonesty of the people who made them.
Now according to Travolta, these people tried to shake him down to the tune of $20 million. They claimed they had pictures of Jett  during his final moments on Earth. That part would seem to contradict Travolta’s earlier claim that the lad was dead when they found him, and may have been for some 18 hours. Furthermore it’s suggested that there was some other information that might damage Mr Travolta’s already tarnished reputation should it come to light. So Travolta did the honourable thing and informed the authorities – perhaps with more alacrity than he called for the ambulance when young Jett was in distress.
The accused tell a different story. Wilchombe, who has had to resign as tourism minister, claims to have been a close friend of the Travoltas for years. Furthermore he wouldn’t even dream of blackmailing John. He merely got word that ‘something untoward’ – his phrase – was going down and he just wanted to clue his good friend in on it. Ms Bridgewater was less fortunate. We’re not exactly sure what her involvement in this whole mess is, but it resulted in the loss of her government job, and of the $40 000 that she used to bail herself out of jail. She’s vowing to fight, and claims that she will be vindicated when ‘the full story comes to light”. Now those sound like fighting words if I’ve ever herd them! They also sound like they might be the words of a woman who knows something! As for Tarino Lightbourne, the ambulance driver and accused mastermind behind the plot, so far he’s acting like any dupe or patsy might: walking around looking stunned and not saying very much.
Now this is where the plot thickens. By way of vindicating themselves, and bringing the whole story to light, Bridgewater and Wichombe have made reference to certain telephone conversations they had with Travolta. They had the foresight and good sense to tape record these amicable little chats (that’s even better than getting it in writing these days – if the court case doesn’t work out you can put them on youtube and really hurt your enemy!). These tapes have been forwarded to the FBI, where they are being pretty thoroughly scrutinized even as I post. In fact they’ve got their voice analysis experts going over them now. So that means the Travolta Files are now officially a federal case. What’s more the thing is getting the full CSI treatment. As for Travolta, for a man who’s a self styled expert on the human mind he sure seems to be acting clumsy and panicky. I’d say that L Ron Hubbard must be spinning in his grave, to see how his followers are conducting themselves; if I weren’t sure that his Thetan is resting comfortably back home on Krypton.

Latest Gossip = Slap Egotists

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